The Larson Family

Sledding and other good stuff

2012-01-22T16:43:00.000-08:00

Over the MLK break, it snowed and we took the kids sledding for the first time all winter. Sad that it was the first time, but it was awesome. We had a lot of fun as a family.

Gotta love the boys Cougar hats!

This year was the first year Keaton realllllllly got into it. Last year he loved it and cried when we were done, but this time he really wanted speed and could carry the sled up the hill when he was done and go by himself...bonus!

The other good stuff I was referring to was our little man is doing so well...this picture shows his cute little body. This is a preemie outfit on him that is really too small for him to wear, but I had to put it on him just once considering by the time he comes home, he will be in newborn clothes. I know, most babies are. But I have some of the cutest dang preemie clothes ever and am sad he wont get to wear them because two of his brothers did. BUT him not wearing them is also good because it means he is growing like he should. I mean really, what other 4 month old is wearing preemie and newborn clothes...I just dont want him to grow too fast because I am just barely getting a start of my time with him!

Paxton is offically down on a low enough setting of oxygen that he has been able to start eating. One bottle per day, one nursing per day. He has done so well with it that whenever anyone picks him up he trys to latch on...to just about anything! He loves it! He, like my other boys, is going to be a champ nurser. And I can't wait to quit pumping and nurse full time! This picture was taken today (sunday, the 22nd) and Cort was giving him a bottle for the first time.

Look at his little fingers wrapped around the bottle! He is so dang cute!!

Paxton and me having some cuddle time...his oxygen always gets turned way down when I am holding him like this...he loves it!!

So they are saying two to three weeks and we might get to take our little man home! I am spending a lot more time at the hospital these days and it will only increase as I feed him more. But I am loving it and it means the end is near!

Catching UP!!

2012-01-14T16:14:00.001-08:00

What a crazy few weeks it has been! For starters, my sweet Brayden turned 6! I have more pictures that have somehow gotten lost on my computer and I cannot find them, but let me tell you- Brayden is such a sweetheart in our family. A big stinker, but a big sweetheart!

He loves to sing and we loved going to his school Kindergarden performance.

We had a very small last minute thrown together birthday party for him with only a few friends. It was fun though! What made it even better was my little sister deciding at the last minute to catch a ride with her sis-in-law to Utah. So she helped me with the party and it was awesome!
We had a family party for his b-day as well (those are the pictures that are missing), but it was last minute as well. In our household during a week and a half we had the following going around:
strep
mastitus (obviously me, worst case EVER)
the flu combined with a bad cold
pink eye (2 kids and me)
Bad colds (mine resulting in blisters in the back of my throat)
So that is why all the parties were last minute and why I haven't posted anything in forever and also why it was so great when my sister came and helped out sooooo much.
While she was here for a few days...Keaton got into a little trouble...

He had my mascara! Stinker! And I got to play with one of my cutie nephews!

And my sister and I got to hang out! It was awesome!

And my sister, who happens to be amazing at photography, took this amazing picture of Paxton.

And a few others to mention...

PS- can I just say how awesome it is to walk into the NICU and actually pick up my baby and hold him?! It is wonderful.

Paxton got moved into a big boy crib! He is doing realllllllllly well right now.

All in all, life has been crazy busy and will continue to get crazier and CRAZIER the closer it comes to Paxton coming home because I will need to be at the NICU all the time. But we are excited and looking forward to him joining our family at home.

Merry and Bright

2011-12-26T19:18:00.001-08:00

Well the week before Christmas was rough. Just plain old rough! I had some issues with one of Paxton's nurses (nothing really bad, just emotional) and then learned a few little things that just made me worry about him. Then with the worrying came less sleep, and with less sleep came a more emotional me! So I was kind of a basketcase. But I pulled together in the end and we had a great Christmas. As great as it could be considering we had our little man in the hospital. But Santa came to both our house and the hospital, so it was great.

My pictures are out of order, but you can figure it out I am sure! Here is Cort and me on Christmas Day with our little man. He is now 5 pounds, 3 ounces and growing! The few times he has worn clothes, the preemie clothes seem to fit him just right! When did he get so big? (I know, my friends who have seen him gawk at how little he is...but to us, he is big!)

One of my favorite nurses Bonnie with him...does anyone else think his hair is looking pretty red here?? The new room he is in (yes, he got moved to a new room and it is SO MUCH BETTER) has a window that lets in a lot of natural light...his hair is almost strawberry now. My mom will love it!
Christmas Eve- 3 handsome boys with their new jammies and slippers!

Keaton on Christmas Day at his Grandparents house...

Christmas morning presents!

Santa brought everyone what they wanted! And I was surprised at the end with a new camera~! Although these pictures were taken before I opened it (on the old camera).

Our little elf with his eyes open- the day after Christmas. Its moments like these that I can't stand it that I can't just grab him and stare into his eyes while holding him. He is just so stinking cute I cant even take it!

This is what they call "the froggie" pillow and I call it "the tooth" because it looks like a tooth. Either way, it's like a light bean bag that molds to their body and paxton loves it on him. I can't wait till he is off the vent! He can't wait either! Hopefully soon.

All in all, Christmas was wonderful. And we are enjoying Christmas break as a family. Hope your Holidays have been wonderful too!

Scrooge

2011-12-09T21:58:00.001-08:00

I am afraid I have turned into scrooge. THE scrooge, BAH HUMBUG! It has been a really rough lousy week! Starting with Monday- it was a bittersweet day...Started out bitter, I went to the female doc for some female stuff that did not go tell well (and let's just leave it at that). But then I made my way to the NICU and it was wonderful. I got to hold my little man for the second time- he seemed so strong and much bigger and more stable than the time I held him before.

Cortney even got to hold him the day before, on Sunday, for the first time.

What a sweet moment!

Later that day I had to go back into my female docs because some stuff from my visit went wrong and had to be taken care of. Not pleasant. I called in late afternoon to check on Paxton and he is doing fine. But when I called back later that evening, the nurse said he had suddenly turned very sick. VERY SICK. Like, he had stopped peeing and was lethargic and acting very sick- just suddenly. Of course I was so very worried. My heart hurt so bad- I wanted to go in and stay with him, but the nurse said to get some sleep so I can stay all day the next day- that he would need me then. So what I should have done was gone anyways because I couldn't sleep at all anyways I was just so worried! She called very early in the morning and Cort and I headed down there just in time for him to have stints put in his kidneys. I could offer many more details of all the things that ended up happening that day- but let's just say when I saw my sweet baby, he hardly looked like my baby he was just so very sick. And it was so sad. Cort and I were there all day and after the day I had Monday, then Tuesday, I was so exhausted that I felt physically ill. The rest of the week things got better with Paxton. He has a bad infection still, but is so much better than he was and is getting better every day. What has made the rest of the week hard is just the reality of my life these days. I keep thinking about Christmas morning. I have my kids at home that I can't wait to see open their presents- and then I have this baby clear across town that I want to be with. Luckily he has wonderful nurses who will be with him whenever I am not, but some days, I just get so sad thinking about it. Add to that taking my car into the shop to fix the door that the wind storm broke, dealing with my fighting boys at home, trying to get a house clean and things ready for the holidays- I am just not handling all the stress well this week!

Most of the time I can hold my head strong and make it through, but for some reason, this week was so much harder. I know most of it is simply that I have a baby in the NICU! And he got very sick! And then you add on everything else going on in my life and it makes sense for me to be a little crazy. But I also know that it is out of my control and I can't change the situation right now...so I just try to take it day by day and not let it get me down.

So as I write this, my house is half way a mess, my kids are finally getting to bed and I am still feeling like a scrooge! But I am making a deal with myself that I just don't like myself this way and my kids are suffering from it too- so we are going to try to have a better week! It HAS to be better than this. I am putting my trust and faith in the Lord and letting him take the reigns from here. Here's to a better week!!

Overwhelmed

2011-12-07T19:31:00.000-08:00

I am overwhelmed. To say the least. My life...well, yes it is crazy these days. Totally crazy, BUT I am mostly overwhelmed because I have let so many things go that I can't even begin to catch up. Like my house...yes, it is cleaned and tidied up daily...for the most part, on the surface, it is clean. But closets? OH the closets! And under beds. And in cubbords. And the basement...these are all things that are cleaned and organized more routinely and since I got pregnant, I did a big fat NOTHING. And I am so far behind. And just the mere *thought* of beginning is overwhelming.

I was thinking all weekend of how there are so many JUNK toys everywhere in my house that need to be thrown out--we have a playroom that is desperate to be organized and is so far gone that I should seriously throw everything out! Which of course I wont. But that is how bad it is! And how wonderful would it be to have all the junk toys thrown out, old toys given away and room made for the new toys the kids will be getting for Christmas?! Well, it would be just wonderful I tell you! Wonderful!!! And did I even metnion my closet to you? You see, I have all my "after baby" clothes in there, mixed in with a few "maternity" that I haven't put away, mixed in with some "in-between babies" clothes that I am starting to fit into. And a few of my skinny clothes are lingering in there from before pregnancy. The truth is, I only wear about 40% of what is hanging up in there...the other 60% seriously needs to be dealt with because it's taking up so much space...but I just can't seem to find any motivation to do anything besides general maintaining of my house.

So it will be left alone. Left alone probably until Paxton is home. It's funny because I still think of projects I want to do for him- I already have all the makings for his quilt...and the thought of making that just excites me! But normally I don't take on any fun projects until the important projects are done. So it will all just wait. Until one day I will hopefully have the motivation. Hopefully. SIGH. One of these days...

Serious Cuteness

2011-11-30T21:08:00.000-08:00

Okay, it does not get any cuter than this. Seriously.

Doesn't he look so tiny with that pacifier in??? Seriously, an angel.
My sweet baby.

I can do it, I can do it!

2011-11-26T22:24:00.001-08:00

I need some motivation!

So, my first three pregnancies, I lost about 10-15 pounds after having the baby, then I hang on to the rest until after I am done nursing. I would work out 5-6 days a week, eat great, etc, but never lost anything. Once I am done nursing, 2 weeks later I drop 15-20 pounds. It's crazy. my body must store it to help the baby or something?! So this time I lost a little more in the beginning, but I think thats because of the stressful delivery, losing so much blood, feeling sick for a little while. And now, I am stuck. Again. But, like the other times- I cannot let that stop me from doing what I know will help me FEEL good, regardless of whether I lose weight from it or not.

I need to get back to feeling like me. Now, of course, because of my situation of having my little man in the NICU and going to the hospital every morning, combined with needing to pump, I can't exactly just rearrange things like normal to work out. But I CAN certainly TRY. And I can eat better. Much better. I admit, for the last weeks, it's kinda been like "well, I'm not going to lose weight anyways." But I realize not only can I NOT have that attitude, I feel terrible the way I have been eating. I know it makes me more tired and just all around yucky. Especially since before I got pregnant, I was the healthiest I think I have ever been in my life! I want to get back to feeling that way and well, just feeling more like ME.

Having a baby, new crazy hormones, plus all the stress of what's going on in our lives right now (not even including the upcoming holidays!), I am bound to feel a little "off." But that doesn't give me the excuse to just let it all go.

So this post is my official motivation starter. I have written it publically now. I have let everyone know that I know I can do better and I am going to start right now! And from time to time, I want to post an update on how I am feeling- maybe letting it out will help push me to do the best I can. So here goes! Wish me luck ;)

A few Halloween pictures...

2011-11-17T21:47:00.000-08:00

Since we didn't get any pictures ON Halloween this year, I had the kids dress up for me last week. They loved it- Kyler didn't want to dress up again for pictures (7 year ols is getting an attitude already!), but Brayden and Keaton were happy participants. ;)

Brayden was a transformer and Keaton was Mr. Incredible.

I guess I really should have said Brayden is a HAM!

Keaton still wears his costume several days a week. He is so dang cute. Anyways, fun FUN! Can't wait till next year when little Paxton can dress up too!

Perspective...during the best day EVER!

2011-11-16T13:40:00.000-08:00

During my pregnancy, a friend of mine posted a video of her babies birth story. Nothing graphic, but you could see right after the baby was born, they placed the baby on her stomach and then she held him. While I watched this, I cried and CRIED because I wanted nothing more than to be able to do the same thing. I haven't been able to with any of my kids other than my first. It was honestly heartbreaking in many ways- something so simple that I wanted SO.BAD. After I had Paxton, obviously I knew that wasn't going to happen. Instead of letting myself get worked up over things like that this time around, I have learned I have to let a lot of it go. I can't change things right now. So much of my life is out of my control, so I accept it and move on. With that being said, I look forward to things as they come up, but don't expect them until they are THERE. So yesterday I was in during my morning visit with Paxton and the doctors came by and did their rounds. At the end, I asked my usual questions and then ended with asking the doctor when they thought Paxton was stable enough to be held. I added that I didn't want to push it if he wasn't ready, but I wanted them to know that I wanted to hold him when I was allowed to. He then replied that Paxton has been really strong the past few days and that the best time was right then because he may have a few bad days again sometime soon. He then told the nurses to get things ready.

I couldn't believe it. My eyes filled with tears and I was overwhelmed with excitement, joy, nervousness and every emotion I could think of all at once. The doctor came and gave me a big bear hug and the nurses got to work!!

Skin to skin is best for the little ones, so skin to skin it is!

This was them placing him on me for the first time...5 weeks and 6 days old.

Getting all the cords, tubes, wires, etc. situated. Notice his little diaper! Notice how tiny he looks up against me! Sure puts how little he is into perspective once I was holding him.
Putting warm blankets on him. Even with the blankets, he weighed basically nothing!

Wearing a mask just to be safe...

My little peanut...on my chest..on ME! He is MY sweet baby!

I held him for an hour and he did amazing.

In fact, when they put him back, he did not like it.

Apparently, he still wanted his mama. It was so wonderful. I was so sad to put him back and leave him, but am holding on to the next moment when I can hold him again!!

Bleh

2011-11-12T20:15:00.000-08:00

We've had a case of the "bleh's" at our house this week. I really am glad I had multiple kids sick at once so we can get it over with and get the germs out and move on. I can't see Paxton when I have sick kids because A. I don't want anyone to watch my kids so THEY don't get sick. and B. I have to be really careful about passing the germs along to Paxton. Not to mention the fact that this time around, Kyler was super needy and insecure and just plan old needed his mama!

I think Keaton felt a bit like this...

And Kyler definetly felt like this...
And although both kids still have lingering symptoms, I think the worst is over. And thank goodness for that.

A Mother's Love

2011-11-07T20:03:00.001-08:00

There is something amazing about a Mom. And there is something even more amazing about MY Mom. I am lucky to be very close with my mom and I truly feel that she is one of my best friend's. When I had Keaton, my mom offered to come whenever I wanted...and I chose to have her come right before he came home from the hospital to help me at that time. This time, when I went on bed rest at the hospital, my mom asked if I wanted her to come and there was no hesitation. Cortney and I talked about it and decided that Friday would be the best day for her to come (I was checked in to the hospital on tuesday). I can say truly that Cortney and I were inspired because she could not have come at a better time...

Although I did not want to have the baby so early, I feel so truly blessed that my mom was HERE when I had the baby. She was not allowed in the room when I had the baby because of him being such a high risk small baby...but having her there the second I came out of the delivery was so reasurring. I truly know I could not have gotten through my hospital stay before having the baby and then coming home right after. I COULD NOT have gotten through all the emotions of everything without my mom being there. There was content and peace in my heart, a comfort, just knowing she was in the room with me.
There truly is nothing like a Mother. The night before I had Paxton, my mom had come up to the hospital and wheeled me down for an ice cream Sunday. It was awesome. Having an ice cream Sunday with my mom...it is actually such a great memory for me and such a pleasant thing to do the night before my life would change forever.

These pictures document TWO very special moments that happened when my mom was in town. The day before my mom had to leave, she and I went to the hospital together to see Paxton. When I walked in the room, they had the lights on for the first time sine I had been there. Normally even when they are checking on the baby, the lights are low. But he was being so calm that they were able to turn the lights in the room on to check on him. When my mom and I came in, I said "well hello Paxton" and he opened his eyes immedietly and was looking around. He stayed awake for about 10 minutes and it was amazing. After things calmed down, my mom and I were both feeling so peaceful and my mom said to me that she had the overwhelming feeling that my Grandma had been there with us for a moment, checking in on Paxton. I knew she was right and we both got teary eyed thinking about it. It was such a special moment that I will never forget.

The next amazing moment happened the next morning. My mom had to be to the airport first thing on Monday morning, but we had about 40 minutes we could visit with Paxton after taking the kids to school. So we were visiting with Paxton and he was very squirmy and having trouble getting settled. The doctors were in the next room doing "rounds" which means they were discussing each baby and their plan for that baby for the day. So the nurse came in and told me they were going to round on Paxton so I could come out and listen (it is my goal to be at rounds every day so I can talk to every single person involved in Paxton's care and know their plans/goals). Paxton was so unsettled that the nurse recommended my mom stay there and put her hands on him to calm him down. This was a HUGE deal because at this point, we didn't really touch Paxton. I had not even done this before...babies at this gestational age are not ready for any kind of stimulation and can only have limited touch. But it was clear, Paxton needed to be settled and since I was leaving the room, the nurse carefully placed my mom's hands on Paxton in a very sweet and special way. It was such a sweet moment. My sweet mom stood so still, being so afraid of putting too much pressure on Paxton that she locked her knees and almost passed out! But once we figured it out, she was fine ;) It was actually a very sweet and special moment. Paxton calmed right down and it was such a nice moment to have right before having to go to the airport. I will never EVER forget it.

And I will never forget her staying up late and brushing and braiding my hair. Taking my kids to store, playing with them, fighting my boys to get them to do their homework, stroking their backs at night to help them fall asleep, cleaning my house, making my family dinner, doing endless laundry and ALL just for us. But more than anything, just being HERE for me during the hardest time of my life and my families lives is something I will never forget. Thank you for being the most amazing Mom and for all you have done for us. I love you Mom!!

Paxton's Birth Story

2011-11-06T20:50:00.000-08:00

This is the ever long emotional journey of the birth of our newest addition. It is long and gross in some areas...sad and emotional in others. It's not exactly the birth stroy I think I want my kids reading later, but I wanted to write down every emotion at this moment for my own records...just keep in mind, it's not the typical baby birth story...

Almost 7 weeks ago on a Sunday night, I found myself debating whether or not to go to the hospital. The few days before that I had started keeping track of my contractions, writing them down to see how often and how close together they were. They were only slightly painful, which was normal for me. But Sunday, I had pretty much had them every hour all day long- and that was WITH laying down ALL DAY. I had a doctor's appointment scheduled for the morning and was really just trying to make it till then without going in. Then I got a phone call. A friend of mine, neighbor AND labor and delivery nurse. We don't talk on the phone often, but she says she couldn't get me out of her mind all day and she was worried about me. I told her about my concerns. She told me to get to the hospital! At first I still denied that I really needed to go. But after talking with Cortney and his mom (who is also a nurse), we decided it was just a risk we couldn't afford to take. So his parents came over and off we went. After the doctor and nurse wrote down just about every little detail of all my birth history, they did an ultra sound and then measured my cervix. It was still long. Baby looked good. Then they "checked me" to see if I was dialated...and I was. I was a 1 and 40% effaced. My history would prove that I go from a 1 to a 10 in 24 hours...and that is WITH the doctor throwing every kind of medicine at me to stop it. I was so worried. I know some women dialate early in their pregnancies, but nothing ever comes of it. That is just not me. So they kept me on the medicine I was already on to stop the contractions and decided to watch me and then let me go to my appointment with my doctor in the morning, as long as I did not progress. To my great surprise, I did not progress all night.
The next morning, I saw my doctor who did all the same measurements and then he sent me home to come back the next morning and be checked. If there was any change, I would be admitted to the hospital. If not, we keep up on the medicine and pray for the best! And of course, strict bed rest. When I came in that Tuesday morning, my cervix had shortened significantly, I had progressed from a 1 to a 2+ (which means some doctors would call it a 2 1/2, some doctors would just call it a 2), AND the baby was feet down literally pushing on my cervix. When the doc checked me, he could FEEL the babies feet. Not a good sign. I was admitted. They threw everything in the world at me to stop the labor. That day I could not eat or drink anything all day and had literally 6 different medications going for various reasons, mostly to stop the labor.

(my boys paid me a few visits during my 2 week hospital stay)

And for some miraculous reason, all the medicines worked! I had no contractions for 24 hours and more importantly, my cervix did not change. No more dialation...it was a miracle! We took a huge sigh of relief...and although my contractions did slowly come back...we thought we had bought ourselves some time. And we did. Just not as much time as we had hoped. (See below my oh so faithful notebook where I wrote every single contraction down. You will notice my handwriting was terrible...that's because I would write them down about half way through the contraction so I knew how long it was going to be and how painful to make note of...)

There was one night when my contractions were especially bad. I cried and screamed through each one. They were as painful as when I HAD Brayden. Yes, HAD, as in dialated to a 10 and pushing him out with no epidurhal! That was the night I asked for pain medicine. Seriously, I hoped to be pregnant for several more weeks at least, but how can one last several WEEKS of those kind of contractions. Did I mention my contractions were anywhere from 3-5 minutes long? Yup. We timed them. Me and the nurses and the doctors because they just couldn't believe it. My back was in constant pain by this point. But once I got on pain medicine, it was a lot better. I then had 2 really calm, nice days and finally said to my nurse "I am going to try to go without the pain medicine tonight, I had felt really good all day." That was when it all started again.
Around 2 in the morning I still couldn't sleep, I had a mega-ultra terrible contraction again and my nurse came in right away with pain medicine. She recommended a hot shower (which has a seat that I sat in) to help ease the pain. I did not argue. I got in and it still wasn't very comfortable. I got out, went to the bathroom and was bleeding. It wasn't a lot, but not good for me. They had the doctor come in a check me and I was a 4 and 80% effaced. Great. Here it comes again. I think at this point I knew my placenta was abrupting and there was truly no turning back. It was a very sad, emotional moment. They sent me to labor and delivery and my pain lessened a little on the contractions, but they also gave me even stronger pain medicine. They also gave me lots of medicines again to stop the labor. They checked me a few times over the next few hours and I stayed the same, so I waited to call Cort until 6:00am so he could sleep a little. He came right away and everything seemed okay until one time when they checked me they told me my water bag was bulging. I knew if my water broke, it was all over. And it was. My water broke a few hours later and they checked me, I was a 7. By this point, every time they checked me I was bleeding. They said my placenta was abrupting, so the baby needed to be born now. There was no stopping it. They sent me to the OR, the baby's head was down, but they needed me in there to pass him directly to the NICU. We thought I would go straight to a 10 in 30 minutes, but with all the medicines to stop the labor, apprently they worked a little because it took me about 2 hours to get a 10 from there. After about 30 mins, they started the pitocin. Slowly but surely I made it there. Time to push. It took about 6 good pushes to get him out, which quite frankly shocked me because Brayden and Keaton were out in 1 push each. But I could not feel where to push...normally even with an epidurhal, I can still feel where to push. But not this time. So it took a little longer. Finally, he came out and Cortney and I sobbed and sobbed. I could not believe I had this baby so little. I tried hard to look at him at the bottom of the table but part of me could not move, I was numb. So I saw him a little, but what I saw more was them passing him into the NICU. He was so little. How could a baby possibly be that little? I cried harder and Cortney did too. And then things got really painful. They were trying to get my placenta out. Now, with my last two, it literally flew out on its own. Not this time. They pushed and pushed and my eppidurhal had worn off and I screamed. And cried. And screamed. They called the tech back in and he gave me more epidurhal. Finally, they got it out and discovered that it had broken apart in little pieces...inside ME! So they had to clamp me open and get it out with forcepts (a DNC). From the time I had Paxton to the time they were done with everything, I think it was about an hour. It was terrible. Even when I couldn't feel the pain, it was terrible. And I was sad. And then I was shivering. The epidurhal had made me very sick and I could not stop shivering, chattering my teeth. I felt freezing, then hott, then freezing. They put 4 warm blankets and a quilt on me. I think THAT lasted another hour, then I calmed down. This part was now in my room with my mom, mother and father in law and Cort's Grandma Nammie. I am not going to lie. This part was so hard for me. I just had a very early baby and I was sick emotionally and physically. I was so grateful when it stopped and I started feeling better.

The whole time all this was going on, Cort asked the nurse every hour or so when he could go and see the baby. We were anxious. I knew I couldn't see him until I was able to at least ride in a wheel chair, but Cort could go right away. The NICU kept passing word along that they were still trying to get all the IV's and lines in. Lines are tubes (tiny) placed so they don't have to poke his foot every 2 hours for blood gases, etc. They could just draw blood, give medicine, etc without poking him. They are similar to IV's, but don't leave a big needle in somewhere! Because the baby's veins were so little and hard to find, it took them a long time. Cortney wasn't able to see him until around 6:30pm or so and we had the baby at 1:47. After Cort finally saw him, he took my mom to go see him. Shortly after they saw him, they went home to take care of our other kids. Around 9:00 that night, I was able to see Paxton for the first time.

It was emotional. I *KNEW* and had told myself he was so little, that he would look so frail and fragile, which he did. But there is something about having a baby in an incubator, hooked up to tubes, that makes the reality of our new life so sad. And overwhelming. And I was so disappointed I had not been able to stay pregnant longer. I was physically feeling sore in every direction and uncomfortable. And sad for my kids at home that have to go with their Mom and Dad leaving them all the time and feeling abandonded. There are/were so many emotions.

And then the Lord steps in, puts a hand on my heart and tells me that it will all work out. I knew that everything had happened for a reason. And we don't know why. But he does. And I put my faith in him and let go of the saddness and the worry. And I let go of all the things that are now out of my control and try my best to do the best I can with the situation I am in. We are so blessed that other kids turned out so healthy and strong. And so we pray that the same will happen for our new baby. We put it all in the Lord's hands and let him take over.

And our nwe life began. Paxton Cortney Larson, born October 5th at 1:47pm at 25 weeks and 6 days gestation. Weighing 2 pounds, 5 ounces, 14 3/4 inches long. He is a miracle!

The bloodiest Halloween ever!

2011-11-03T20:10:00.000-07:00

It's been a rough week. I wish I had all these fabulous Halloween photos to post, but the truth is, Halloween was spent all day at the hospital. But not for Paxton. For ME! I really need to get around to finishing writing Paxton's birth story, because that would tell the tale of how after I had Paxton, my placenta broke apart into many different pieces. They had to do a DNC on me to get all the pieces out. Apparently it is really hard to tell placenta from a blood clot- they look similar. And after you have the baby, you have a lot of blood clots inside. So they thought they had gotten it all, gave me a shot to stop the bleeding, stitched up my then-mutilated cervix and it was done. They told me the signs to look for in case they did not get it all. Like hemmoriging. Yeah, that. So I am walking through Target on Monday with ALL THREE BOYS and can tell that I am bleeding (which I have not stopped since having the baby...I know, too much information). So I keep going about my business but can tell I am bleeding a lot. I then look down and my clothes are soaked THROUGH WITH BLOOD. It is down my legs and everything. (can you say your worst high school night mare? starting your period at school and not having anything to cover it up....yeah) So I grab the boys, we head to the bathroom where clot after clot after CLOT comes out. It was everywhere. It was terrible. I call my doc who says to go to the nearest emergency room. After changing my clothes and dropping off my kids, I'm in the ER. The bleeding stopped for a time, then it came back with a vengance and it was terrible. They did an ultrasound and could see there was still placenta to be removed. They had to do another DNC to get it out...but at least this time they put me out for it! Cortney met me there later and his parents took our boys trick or treating. We did not get home until 9:30 that night and I was very sick from the anestesia.

Lets just say, the worst Halloween ever! BUT my kids had a great time with their Grandparents and I am so happy for that. I just wish I had thought to ask them to take pictures. We are going to have them dress up another time and take some soon...they were so seriously cute~!

AND now let's move on to Paxton...

He had a GREAT week!

I made him a blanket to go over his issolette. Like my other boys, it has his name on it...
This little tyke is now a whopping 3 pounds! He is on a conventional ventilator and starting to eat again (through a tube, of course). His lungs are clearing up and he is all around so much healthier than he used to be. He still has a long ways to go, but I am so grateful for how well he is doing right now.

Thanks again for all the love and prayers that are always sent our way...we can tell they are working!!

Family

2011-10-27T21:12:00.000-07:00

When I finally get the chance to finish writing the birth story, you will hear all about my mom being here for some of my hospital bed rest and for the birth of our little babe. This post is about the amazing family I have and the timing of my little sister being here. A few months into my pregnancy, my little sister told me she wanted to come when I am on serious bed rest and will need serious help. I did not argue with her. Over the next month or so we talked about dates and times and waited for a good airline deal. She booked it for last week (which would have put me at 28 weeks pregnant) and we were good to go. When I ended up going on bed rest sooner, then in the hospital, she offered several times to change her flight and come see me sooner. I don't know WHY, but I strongly felt that she should keep the original date. Ever time I thought about it, I felt the same way. So we kept the date, and I know now WHY I felt that way.

She ended up coming a few days after Paxton had to be transfered to primary children's hospital for some kidney worries. It was a very emotional time for me- a time when I needed to have someone to vent to (besides my sweet husband who always gets vented to), someone to go with me to the hospital, someone to help me with the kids, etc. And she did just that!! PLUS she fixed my hair and makeup, gave me a pedicure, swept and mopped and vacummed and did just about everything I couldn't do this week! (Don't let me forget to add, vacummed and cleaned my disgusting neglected car!!) It was an answer to my prayers, truly.

She also happens to be VERY good at taking pictures...check out this amazing photo she took- look at the details of little Paxton's hand. Amazing.

This was our last night together before she had to fly home...we spent it with little Paxton at the hospital and had the nurse take a picture of us...can you tell we were pretty worn out that day? (okay, my little sis still looks amazing...but I was....well...not so much)

My computer was having problems, I flipped this picture like a million times...sooo, anyways, its us looking through to little Paxton.

All in all, it was a great week that went by so fast and I am so incredibly grateful to have such a great support system from my family. One phone call from any one of my family always makes my day- I know that at any time, any one of them would drop everything to help one of us out. I am so lucky to be part of such a great family! Thank you to my sweet sister for coming and taking the time to take care of me and my family!! Did I mention she has an 8 month old? Yes, she is amazing. Love you sis! (P.S.- Bekah, you can put pics up on your blog now if you want ;))

Our New Life

2011-10-16T21:23:00.001-07:00

I don't feel comfortable posting a ton of pics on facebook, especially because I know that not everyone can handle seeing a little tiny baby hooked up to all kinds of tubes and wires, etc. But I want show off my sweet adorable baby!! So here are just a few of my favorites ;) My sister took some of me visiting with Paxton a few days ago...so here I am looking in on him in his bed (PS-Thanks to my awesome sister for pampering me and doing my hair!)

The vent giving him oxygen, along with a feeding tube.
His diapers look like small maxi pads. Seriously.

His cheek kinda swollen from the tape they had taken off. Poor little guy.

Here's him kinda swollen and hooked up to the billie ruben lights.

Here I think he looks exactly like Brayden! He looks big in this picture up close, but if you want to get an idea of his size...his head is about the size of my fist. His hand is about the size of the middle of my knuckle to my fingernail. He is so tiny and fragile and yet so strong already.

This is my absolute favorite! He loves having a little warm onsie on his head for some crazy reason, and the second I started talking to him, he opened his eyes for me. It was so sweet. I loved it and love having pictures of it. All in all, we are so grateful he is as healthy and strong as he is. He is such a sweet boy already- and has quite the attitude (which terrifies me!) but we are so glad he is a fighter! Keep the prayers coming, as he has had some major difficulties this week. But he is doing better...two steps forward, five steps back.

Yawn.

2011-10-14T19:47:00.000-07:00

I am in the middle of writing Paxton's Birth story. It is a LOOOONG story. So many details starting from bed rest on. So I am taking a break and just writing a little update to say I am ALIVE. Barely. Up until yesterday, my kids, hubby and I were getting used to our new life. Every morning I get up, get the kids and myself ready, take the kids to school, drop Keaton off at a friends house to play, and then I am off to the NICU. I visit with Paxton, get the update on Paxton during rounds (when all the doctors get together at once to talk about the babies in the NICU) and discuss the plans for that day with the doctors and nurse. I make it home just in time to either be there when carpool brings Brayden home, or am there to pick him up myself. I then get Keaton, we eat lunch together at home and have a normal day. I am there for both Kyler and Brayden when they get home from school. We do homework, we do chores, we have a normal life. I then go up to the NICU after the kids are in bed and Cort goes up on his lunch break at work. Our kids at home have a mostly normal life and Paxton gets 2-3 visits a day. We can't hold him yet. We can touch him here and there, but the less the stimulation, the better. So we are happy with things.

And then there are some concerns that send him to Primary Childrens. It is one of the best hospitals in the world (in the top 10, I believe). They are a great hospital. They just do things completely different. And so we are starting over. Meeting new doctors and nurses, and residents and they are over-crowded. And Paxton is the least of their concerns as far sick babies go, because he is mostly healthy and only fighting things that kind of come with prematurity. I know, I know. They ARE concerned. They do care. It's just hard. It's sooooooooo different. The way things are communicated is so different. Today I practically had to fight to get some answers. Once I got the answers, everything was fine. I just needed someone to communicate with me!! Someone of authority, who knows what they are doing!

Anyways, so that's our new life. We are waiting every day to see how things progress. I am at my house, leaving a sweet baby behind in the care of someone else. That is HARD. I feel so helpless as a mother. In some ways, I have been able to let things go this time. There is so much that is out of my control that I have to let some things go. And I can't drive myself crazy with worry until I have a reason to. So we are taking things one day at a time.

And other than yesterday and today, life is slowly getting back together piece by piece, as much as it can be considering we have a baby in the NICU. We have been brought meal after meal, had our kids taken care of by various friends/family members/neighbors. We have had so much support, so many prayers. We can feel them. We know that the miracles that have already happened, have happened because of the faith of those around us. We are so eternally grateful.

What's a Mom to do?

2011-09-25T16:20:00.000-07:00

I have this white haired mischevious boy named Brayden. He is 5. Ever since he was born, he has been a fighter. He has held his own. He has...been curious. We have gone through stages where he has been a master escape artist. A year ago, we got a high lock for the front door (out of anyone's reach except an adult), we put a bar in the sliding glass door at the top, so he would stop escaping. It would be one thing if he escaped, ran out the front and there you would fine him. No, he would randomly go into people's houses, without knocking, asking to play. And I would be in the bathroom and come out, and he's gone and I have no idea where he is. So once all the locks were installed and he couldn't get out...he started going into the garage, opening my car door, clicking the clicker to open the garage, and running out that way. Smart kid eh? Too smart for me! I started locking my car door...which was a PAIN, but necessary. I also did my valiant effort to teach him, explain to him, discipline him as to why he cannot do what he was doing. After a little while it sunk in. The older he has gotten, the more responsible. I really thought that stage of our lives was over. Until I was put on bed rest. Well, I guess it happened slightly before. And what would my clever escape artist do this time? Well, he would be at a friends house, playing, WITH my permission. I am thinking, "he is safe, being watched." However, when he is done playing the friend, instead of coming straight home (because our backyards connect and he can literally walk 25 steps from house to house), he would walk somewhere else. I found out one day he had been to four different houses asking to play on his way home! Seriously! He thinks he can do whatever he wants!! That day, he was grounded for an entire week...which believe me, was way harder on ME than it was on him. I talked to him every day about strangers, dangers, and how I wasn't just trying to be a mean mom, but that he seriously could be hurt somewhere and I wouldn't even know where to look for him. I finally give him a little freedom after his week of groundation, test things out again, see if he can come straight home after playing with a friend...and NO. Now enters me on bedrest. Someone comes to the door, I answer it and don't even know that Brayden is right beside me (cause the little devil is quiet and sneaky)- he takes off RUNNING down the street. I walk out, yelling after him, offering threats of "come back right now or your grounded." He doesn't care. The taste of freedom as he is running must be too good cause he doesn't care. I have to get in my CAR to get him, because not only can I NOT even walk that far, but he is far too fast for me right now. I have grounded him, put him in numerous times outs, given him more chores, done reward charts for being good and obeying and not running away, and everything under the sun to try and get this kid to listen. He just knows I cannot literally chase after him like I used to and seriously doesn't CARE! I am at a loss for what I am to do. So this week, as we start a new and glorious week of me being bound to the couch or the bed, I am trying to get up all the positive reinforcements I have inside me to try and convince him to make good choices. The funny thing is, this same kid is the kid I can ask to get Keaton or me something at any time, and he will. He will share anything he has with anyone, even if it means giving up a precious toy or treat. He has made me breakfast in bed and cleaned up after it three times in the last two weeks. He compliments me. He is incredibly sweet- which makes his mischeviousness even more hard to deal with. He really is a really good kid. I just have to figure out how to get him to stop RUNNING all over the neighborhood. Wish me luck...I think it is going to be a very long week!! And might I add...this is all Cortney's genes coming through...just ask his parents! ;)

Answers

2011-09-21T19:47:00.000-07:00

So of course this whole pregnancy, our whole family has been praying. All the time. We want this baby to stay IN and he is already showing signs that he is going to come whenever HE wants to come...so we are just praying hard and doing what we can.

And then things start happening. Like: My little sister calling me telling me she is booking her ticket to come and take care of me and my family for a week to help me on bed rest. Like: Two people bringing me meals, randomly, on the same day, which happen to be days that have been incredibly hard and where I have really needed the help. Like: My in-laws calling and saying "we're picking up the boys after school today and taking them for a few hours so you can rest..." and then when they bring the boys home they do the dishes for me! Like: My visiting teachers and one of my good friends bringing me magazines, soda and candy care packages to help me get through bed rest...WOW. These things don't just happen. And this is only a fraction of the service our family has recieved lately. But I am serious when I say, these things always happen when I need it the most. Yesterday was a really hard day, then today two meals and no kids. It's like they are all inspired to help me. And I am so eternally grateful. It is hard to ask for help. It is hard to recieve help even when I really need it. I feel like I could be doing more, or should be doing more. But then everyone that helps me does it with a smile and a kind heart, and kind words and everything. And I am overwhelmed! The Lord is watching over us and answering our prayers.

Now, on a totally different note...I cannot stop thinking about the movie Jane Eyre! Have you seen it yet?! Have you read the book? I admit, I had not read the book. So I had no idea what to expect. And it is not your typical old fashioned love story. There is so much more to it- and I rented it the other day and I just can't stop thinking about it. WOW. Go rent it!

And on yet another note, I have read a new book basically every 3 days for the past two weeks...so I am finally getting through my stack of books that I have had to read for a LONG time! I love it! Of course Mockinjay was totally disappointing, but I was going to read it no matter what and still love the series.

Another random note: have finished an entire book of crossword puzzles, totally makes me miss my Grandma. But an entire book in 2 weeks...that is a lot of crosswords!

I guess that's enough for now. Doesn't my life of reading, watching movies and having people wait on me hand and foot sound so exciting?!!! Well, this IS the kind of life every mother wants to have, except not being on bed rest and having contractions. It really quite STINKS but I am so grateful to do whatever I can to keep this baby in.

OH MY GOODNESS!!!!

2011-09-13T18:45:00.000-07:00

Two amazing things happened today...the most important being that this little babykins does not have what Brayden has (aortic stenosis), which is a heart condition that will eventually require surgery... we are so relieved and grateful.

The second is the NEW Breaking Dawn trailer has come out...WOWWWWW. Cannot wait...so hope this baby cooperates so I can see it midnight showing ;)

Cannot wait, cannot wait, CANNOT WAIIIITTTTTTTTTT!

Body Image...and all that jazz

2011-09-13T09:47:00.001-07:00

When I learned I was pregnant this time around, I must admit that I was sad about what was going to happen to my body. Don't get me wrong...pregnancy is a beautiful, amazing thing. And everything is worth it. Buuuut, as I have said before, I am not one of those women who just grows a baby in my belly. I fill out everywhere. And I do mean, EVERYWHERE. Even my feet get bigger! When I was pregnant with Brayden (boy #2), I worked out for the first few months. For me, didn't matter. I mean, sure, it helped keep up my energy and I am sure helped with toning. But I still gained the same amount of weight and still gained it everywhere and not just in my cute little tummy.

So as I was saying, when I learned I was pregnant with this little nugget, I went through some terrible body image issues. I had literally in the weekes before FINALLY hit my goal of where I wanted to be with my body. I was feeling so good about myself. I was confident. I was happy and content. And I knew that was all going to change. ESPECIALLY since I cannot work out with my current and last pregnancy. And especially because I had never worked so hard in my life to lose the weight I had lost. And I am going to have to do it again.

And of course, there is nothing wrong with being whatever size I am or whatever size anyone else is. Why do I have so much trouble when viewing myself when I could care less about whatever shape or size someone else is? I think all women, no matter shape, size, color, hair color, etc. are beautiful. Everything we go through makes us beautiful. If you are bigger, you are bigger. If you are smaller, you are smaller. I have always felt that if you are unhappy with yourself, you work on it and try your best. If you are doing that, accept yourself. Everyone is different and I have always embraced that and loved that about everyone...except myself. Why? I suppose for lots of reasons. But with pregnancy, I definetly need to get over it!

So with time, I have realized that it is out of my hands. No, I am not going to use pregnancy as an excuse to pig out as much as I want. I am still trying to be sensible. But, it really is out of my control how my body is going to grow babies. If I am going to gain weight everywhere, why go around feeling terrible about myself every time I look in the mirror? Is that honestly going to help me at all?

I must do the best with what I have and embrace my curves! ;) So up until now...I have not wanted to post pictures of myself. In fact, this whole pregnancy I have had issues with it...but why? What good is it doing me other than making me feel even worse?

We as women are blessed to be able to even carry babies (those of us who are able to)...we are lucky to experience pregnancy, childbirth and many other wonderful things. If that means gaining 45 pounds in 7 months (hopefully this time I can make it to 9 months!), then so be it. And if I have to go through all I go through to grow a miracle, then it is worth it!

There! I feel better! Sooooo...here is ME at 23 weeks along with baby boy #4

And you will pretty much always see me in flip flops. Just saying...

The latest Larson happenings...

2011-09-11T19:19:00.000-07:00

So if any of my blog followers are on facebook, and I know most of you are, I was wondering how I was going to identify my kids backpack's for the teachers (because most of them ask you to write your cbild's name ON the backpack) WITHOUT writing their name on the outside of the backpack. I did not want strangers being able to read their names and call them. It was an easy solution- and thanks to all the advice on FB, and a link from my little sis with an idea, I made these cool name tags for the insides of their backpacks. The kids LOVE THEM!

Kyler, especially, is into SKULLS, so I used that as a theme. Of course, we use skulls in a friendly way, as friendly as they can be... :)

My camera has issues, so this was as close as I could get without them being too blurry...I think they turned out pretty good. But most of all, they get the job done and the kids love them!

Since school has started, we have been going to bed earlier and earlier. The kids get to read for 20 minutes in their beds, then I read them a story. But on the weekends, we do let them stay up late...especially Friday nights. Sometimes, however, that means they try and slumber together or they go into the hallway and sleep. Weird. But seriously, to come upstairs and see this was really cute. The lights were off, but I turned them on for the picture and they didn't even flich!

Is there really anything better than a cute sleeping face up close?!!!!

One of my bestest friends in the whole world came to visit for a day (she lives in Boise) and did some cleaning for me, helped my kids with their homework and we had a great time visiting!! My kids truly LOVE her and could not get enough of her IPAD or notebook or whatever you call it! It has so many games and cool things and she would patiently sit and show them how to play, etc. As you can see, they were ALL OVER HER!

Let's just say, when they woke up the next day and learned she wasn't there, they were sad...and so was I! We truly love her and she is such a sweet friend!

All in all, it was a good week. I FINALLY got to see MY doctor on Tuesday, who as I thought would, put me on medicine to stop my contractions. It is mostly working! I still have 1-2 contractions a day. But most are shorter than they were before..and quite frankly, as long as I know nothing is wrong, I can handle a few contractions here and there.

He told me to stay on moderate bed rest. I can still take kids to school, do some light things around the house here and there as long as I am taking it easy and laying down as much as I can in between. And of course, only if I am not contracting. If I am still contracting, I am DOWN. So far, it has been decent. I am finally to the point where I can read a book without falling asleep, so I am getting into some books I have had for a long time. I read a book in a day and a half and I don't know if I have ever done that before! It was an easy read, but still. I load and un load the dishwasher and wipe the counters down every day, but other than that, am mostly lounging around. I have felt much better knowing that I am back in my doctors hands and he is taking every thing I say seriously. So far, so good. This baby is still cooking and that is all that matters!

A special thanks to all my sweet neighbors! In one night, I had two different meals brought in randomly! It was so nice! Today alone we had two dinners to freeze brought in and 2 different sets of treats! WOOWWWW!!!

I have said it before and I will say it again. Living away from family is TOUGH. Especially when there are times like these where I know they would be helping me and I know I wouldn't feel bad letting them....because they are family! But if there is anywhere I can live away from family and get non-stop help it is HERE in this exact neighborhood. When we had Keaton, it was the same thing. Constant meals, people watching our kids non-stop so I could go to the NICU and everyone does it without a complaint- and they make me feel that they want to do it! it is amazing! It is hard to rely on others for help- it is hard to ask for help! It is hard to leave my kids in the hands of others, feeling helpless to spend time with them, but yet spend time with the new baby at the hospital, or on bed rest, etc. Being here I am overwhelmed at the constant service we are provided. As hard as it is to live away from family, and as much as I miss them so much, this is such a great place to live and get the help our family needs right now. So thank you friends and neighbors! You are all wonderful! And truly, we could not get through this without you!

Now onto another week of surviving...I finally have decided on some creative ideas for the baby's bedding and it is using a lot of what I already have and making a new quilt (which I do for each baby anyways) and maybe a few other things...but all in all, I am just excited to have found what I am looking for!! And I will post about it as soon as I get moving on it.

Keaton's Big Birthday!

2011-09-06T08:55:00.000-07:00

I asked Keaton what kind of birthday party he wanted this year, and after listing off all the superheros and fun ideas I had, he kept going back to "spiderman"...so we had a spiderman party! It was just with family, since he is only 3, but it was so great. I did not go all out. I did not have it in me, but I made his favorite things...which are: CUPCAKES! Keaton loves cupcakes and asks for them all the time. So that made my job easier, rather than doing a cake. The store had tons of spiderman stuff, so I bought more than I made this year.

Here's the table all decorated...

Keaton getting ready to open presents...blowing through a leftover pvc pipe.
Getting a puppy dog pillow pet, which he LOVES!

I was really unsure what to get him because he is so easy going and happy with anything. But I found these lincoln logs at Ross and knew they were perfect! Especially since Keaton loves building things! I must admit, part of me was excited because I loved Lincoln logs as a kid...oh the memories!

He also got a spiderman tent that he plays in every single day, but the picture was too blurry since every one I took of him with the tent he wouldn't sit still ;)

Everyone singing to him, getting ready to eat cupcakes!

His brothers get some too!

Brayden would not be serious to save his life. That kid!

Cousin Norah...so cute! Loves her mini cupcake ;)

Keaton is such a great toddler that I feel so lucky! He is easy going, will do just about anything I ask him to do and is also independent in a good way. the things he really wants to do himself are things that couldn't make me more proud (at least most of them). He really has a sweet spirit, sweet presence in our home and I could not love him any more! He still is my little peanut, being only 24 pounds at 3 years, but he is steadily growing and getting taller! Love, love this little man~! And I cannot believe he is 3!

--Elizabeth

Somehow I will Survive

2011-09-04T17:20:00.000-07:00

First of all, I am sorry all my stupid posts lately are about ME, MYSELF and I. Not about my beautiful kids, my sweet husband and all the wonderful things we have done lately.

I know, I KNOW! I have only been on bed rest a few days...and for all I know, everything will be fine in a few days and I can get up a little more. But for the current moment, I can vent. About ME!!! Ha! Because how does a person like me (clean freak, organizational junkie, on the go constantly) sit still while the house gets destroyed right in front of my very eyes while all I can do is lie around and watch it happen????? My boys will clean, and they do. But not to my standards! They can't wipe down counters and mop floors! Floors that are disgusting because mom isn't helping wipe up spills. Cort is great and helps out as much as he can while he is home. But he has had a boat-load of work lately AND is now making dinners and taking care of the kids on top of it. I am the kind of person that if I go to bed and my house is messy, I don't sleep well. And so usually, around 9pm, I do a run through of the whole house and clean up, pick up, do anything that needs to be done. And then I still don't sleep well because I have stinking insomnia with pregnancy- but at least I sleep much better than I do when the house is messy. So I have not been sleeping well. And I literally cringe as I am walking down the hallway to the bathroom (for the millionth time since I have been drinking extra water) and I see toys in the walkway, stains on the floor, etc. I have Kyler sweep the floor today...on a SUNDAY! I never make the boys clean on Sundays...and the sad truth is even though there were still crumbs everywhere after, it looked SO MUCH BETTER than it did before!

Oh boy. It is going to be a long bed rest if this is until I deliver this babykins. I am hoping it will be at least modified at one point to me being able to do light cleaning again. Obviously I will do whatever is best to keep this baby in. And I will grin and bear it! But I can whine in the meantime. I am a hormonal mess anyways. So why not, right? ;)

Whine, whine, whine, moan, moan, whine. I think that is enough for now. Back to bed for me, another crossword puzzle to do and more baby names to look up!

--Elizabeth

A New Day

2011-09-02T22:09:00.000-07:00

Today was a new day. A wonderful new day. I woke up feeling SOOOOOOOOOO much better. I had three contractions total today. That is so completely different than yesterday- AND I woke up without the terrible stomach ache and back ache that has plagued me. I woke up thinking "maybe I did have a virus" because I don't think I could feel this much better without an antibiotic...unless it really was a virus. What a terrible stinking virus!

Anyways, the doc's office ended up calling me this afternoon to tell me that all my tests came back negative for anything. Then they told me the doctor is on call and at the hospital all weekend if my contractions do get worse or do feel like they are the beginnings of labor. I don't know, but it was what I needed to hear. All this time it seems like they disregarded my concerns for the contractions and didn't take them seriously. But I think after seeing me yesterday maybe they changed their tune? I don't know. But it was nice.

But what is even nicer is I think they are going away! I am still ordered to bed rest until they are completely gone. And since it's the weekend and Cort is here to help, that is exactly what I plan to do! I am already bored to tears. But I have spent a lot of time online looking up fun baby ideas, baby names and all that good stuff.

Speaking of baby...he is all over the place now. I love feeling all the movement all the time. He is one crazy little man already.

I will keep ya'all posted (that is if any of you actually read this because NO ONE leaves comments anymore~!). It's all good. I hardly ever comment on anyone elses. Just saying. ;)

The Doctor Debate

2011-08-31T21:38:00.001-07:00

I am going to whine. Yesterday and today were rough days. Tuesday I had my big 20 week ultrasound- which was awesome. Seeing this little man move around, have the hiccups at one point, and show off his man-hood to the camera as much as possible, was awesome. But can I tell you how dissapointed I was when I learned my Dr. had to change his shift for some reason and couldn't see me. My Dr. is amazing. I love him, and he knows ME. He takes me seriously. He knows I don't complain about something unless I am worried. He knows what needs to be done when I worry. Soooo...I was sad he wasn't there because I had a worry to talk about. The Dr. I saw was good. She didn't necessarily brush off my concerns, but she thought they were nothing to worry about.

I told her I wasn't sure, but I thought I may have had a contraction or two in the past few weeks. I told her I never have contracted before I have actually started my downwhirl spiral into labor. It's always two weeks before I have the baby, I slowly start contracting. First one here, one there, then several a day, then every hour, then close together, etc. AND nothing happens for me until it happens. So I will contract for 2 weeks without any dialation, without my cervix shortening/thinning-nothing, until the day before I deliver. Same pattern for my last two boys. Now, I know my body. I just do. If there is something I don't know, I figure it out. I don't call the Dr. for the little aches and pains that I have had every stinking day of this pregnancy...because they are nothing. Even things I haven't had before, I have been calm. So I left the doctor Tuesday happy and yet...feeling like I really wish I could have seen my Dr.

So yesterday morning, I am visiting teaching. Sitting on the living room floor chatting away with two other moms when I have a real.true.contraction. I knew it was real. There was no question. Same as always- I feel it in the front and back. Hmmmmmm...I am thinking. This is not good. I have two more within the hour. So after I get Brayden from kindergarden (which was straight from VT), I call my Dr. I talk to the nurse in detail about everything. I tell her that I am not one of those that freaks out over little things- I am not one to call in about a contraction unless I am truly worried it will lead somewhere. Well guess what? She will talk to the Dr. on call b/c my doctor wasn't in. I knew automatically what that doctors response was going to be...and I was right.

Now, the only complaint I have about my Dr. is not a fair one. He goes out of the country and helps deliver babies for FREE. He does this as a service. He is one of the number 1 doctors in UT and he has done studies over the last 20 years on premature births and why women go into labor early. He is great...but sometimes that means he is not there for me. And normally I don't care and love all the dr.s he works with. But not yesterday! I knew when the nurse told me that that she would call me back with a "lay down, take it easy and this is fine"...which is what she did. Now I understand. Lots of women contract all through pregnancy. lots of women have these things happen and it's no big deal. I just never have had it happen this early, and I have never had it happen unless I am on the process of going into labor!!
So I laid down the rest of the day, still randomly contracting...did I tell you my contractions hurt? Yep, from the very beginning, they hurt. Not too bad until closer to when I deliver...but I am not making this up people! They hurt! So I had a few more yesterday and then Cort gave me a blessing last night. I went to bed and was up most of the night as usual-stinking insomnia! Even with unisom, I wake up at least 5-6 times. I contracted once during the night (I have written down every contraction and what I was doing at the time to keep track) and then first thing this morning, a big one. I called my doctors office before I even think they were open. I realized that my stomach and back are killing me like ALL THE TIME. I really suspected that I either have a virus or infection of some kind and that is what is cauing all this. I left them and detailed message and asked them to call me. They did and asked me to come in to have some tests done. They agree with me, HOWEVER, I know they are not super concerned. Which totally bugs me. I KNOW they get women who contract all the time- they are high risk doctors. But that is NOT ME! I am not one of those women- something is going on! And this little lad is way too little to come even two weeks from now~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So I went in, explained my heart out (to the nurse and the doc on call since my doc is not in still) and basically repeated myself over and over "there is something going on, this is not normal"...which they agree with. They did blood work, swabbed me for all kinds of tests, took my urine and all the goods and will call me with the results. The doctor could tell I was in pain. He was nice and sincere. But I know that if I had seen MY doctor, he would not have messed around one bit. he would have done all the same tests, however he would have put me on something preventatively already AND possibly given me something to stop the contractions...

I am just not satisfied! I am, but I'm not. Does that make sense? There is no use in me worrying right at this moment because I have done all I can do. I am waiting for results and can go from there. But I do so hope and pray that my doctor is in soon because he knows me. And I am hoping and praying that there IS something going on- it would explain this! And of course, more than anything, I just want the contractions to stop. NOW!

So I am on bed rest until they do. Which, the doctor politely laughed while talking to me about it...he said "I'm sorry to be rude and laugh...I am just watching your kids and you have your hands full!" Little did he know my kids were being SOOOOO GOOD at the time!! He has no idea! ;) But they have been pretty good with me being down and getting things for me, etc.

And speaking of getting things for me- I am so grateful to my family and friends for the love and support they have shown. From taking my kids to bringing me dinner...I am so lucky to have the extra help in my time of need. Thanks everyone! Keep the prayers coming and I will keep you posted!

--Elizabeth

Quick and Easy Project

2011-08-29T14:10:00.000-07:00

So I am bad at starting but not finishing projects. Not all of them- but sometimes I think of something I want to make/do, go out and get some of the supplies, then lose my motivation to actually follow through. But while I was at girls camp, and our flag was hanging on this really cool stand the other camp leader had made for it, I got a brilliant idea!

And then when I was at IKEA, I decided to follow through my idea. I'll explain that later...so I went to Home Depot with all the parts from our flag stand, had PVC pipe cut in the same dimensions, bought the attachments for it (about $5.00 total for everything)...

Then went to the fabric store and got some cute fabric...

And made a puppet show stage...

Seeing the fabric and attatchment pieces up close...
And the puppets I got at IKEA for dirt cheap. A package of 6 for like $3?

My kids have been using it as a stage...they have given us a puppet show like every day...yesterday I convinced Kyler to do one for his stuffed animals (cause I can only see so many from each child!)

Total cost was around $15 including fabric, pvc pipe, puppets. Not too bad- and it took me like 30 minutes to sew up the fabric curtains...not too bad either. All in all, for the hours of fun it has already provided my children- not to mention the creativity they use to create their own show, is worth it!!

NICU Reunion

2011-08-29T14:06:00.000-07:00

Well we couldn't make Brayden's NICU reunion this year, but we were able to go to Keatons. Of course it was great. He loved having his face painted, but did not want me to take a picture of him after!!

This was the best I could get for "say cheese"...
They had a funny magic show that the kids loved and Keaton even got called up on stage! It was great except it was so short by the time I got my camera out, I missed the shot. At least the kids could pose with some cool characters later...

The only disappointment is that Keaton''s/my favorite nurses weren't there that night. It was still awesome/worth it/tons of fun- but I always love seeing them.

Girl's camp!

2011-08-28T21:02:00.000-07:00

Girl's Camp was awesome. Seriously. The girls were amazing. There were no petty fights, no arguments amongst the girls. In fact, they all got along so well and clearly loved it and loved each other. It was awesome. While I was there, I had a lot of time to reflect on my life and it really made me grateful to be part of an amazing church. Seriously. So lucky.

This is my ward and the other ward we just split from together (we combined for Girl's camp)

Some seriously funny, cute SHOW OFF girls!! ;)
Girls doing a RAP for the stake leaders. I wish the picture had turned out, cause it was just awesome.

The last night at a devotional...half the girls.

The other half...

I AM glad it is over. But I am also sad that I don't have that to look forward to anymore. It was really fun. But yes, WHEW. It's done. :)

Amazing

2011-08-24T21:21:00.000-07:00

I have the most amazing family. I really do. And my little sis is one of the most talented people I know. I told her I was thinking of going with an "owl" theme for this baby- and so she whipped up something extra cute and sent it to me as a little surprise. And I LOVE IT.

Since my camera has not yet arrived in the mail yet and I could not take pictures myself...and since you need to check out her cool blog anyways...

Go here. http://beckaboots.blogspot.com/

Check out what she made me. And how awesome she is. It's okay if you are jealous of me having such an awesome sister. I totally understand. :)

Thanks again Sis! Love you!

Ohhhhhhh Kyler

2011-08-23T20:15:00.000-07:00

Klyer sometimes puts too much food in his mouth when he eats something that is really good. It is a problem he has, because he ends up having to spit it out and throw it away because he is gagging with too much food in his mouth.

Case in point: We are driving to Las Vegas to stay the night on our way to San Diego. Whenever we go to LV, we stop in St. George and eat at Mongolian BBQ- the best food ever. And we always end up having leftovers. So about 45 minutes after we ate, I was opening my container in the car to eat some more (my 2nd dinner of the night) when Kyler asks if he can have some. "Sure," I say and hand it back to him. A few minutes later, Kyler says to me, "Mom, don't worry, but I threw up a little, but I mixed it around so you can't tell where I threw up so you can still eat it."

And then I about threw up.

And then today, another case in point:...The conversation went something like this...

Me: "Kyler, how was school today?"

Kyler: "Great mom, except at lunch I threw up those cookies you gave me. They were really good except I put them both in my mouth at the same time and it was too much so I threw up."

Me: "oh Kyler, wow...." and before I could finish...

Kyler: "Mom, can I have another cookie when we get home?"

I must say, they were homeade chocolate chip cookies, so they were pretty dang good.

So silly Kyler. Something new we need to work on- not putting so much food in his mouth!!

Cali...the beginning

2011-08-20T17:35:00.001-07:00

So we decided kinda last minute to take a trip to Cali! Originally, 6 months ago, we were talking about taking the kids to Disneyland for the first time this year. Once I got pregnant, we knew I couldn't ride any of the rides--and then once we measured Brayden, he is still 2 inches too short for most of the rides. So next year we decided...but then we still really wanted to take a family vacation and there is so many other things to do in California that we started planning. We had one date picked and quickly learned it wouldn't work. At the last minute, like a week and a half before we actually went on the trip, we realized a certain weekend would work and there you go!

It was great!! We went to Sea World, the beach, the Mormon Batallion Museum, Cort's brothers house (his brother moved there like a month ago, sooo it was last minute to see him too) and ended up having a great time.
This is the only real family photo we got because I hate myself in pictures these days. I just get so big everywhere when I am pregnant and HATE how I have been looking in pictures...but this one turned out cute...at least as cute as I get these days.

So that is all for now I am afraid. I have been looking endlessly for my camera ever since we got back. I offered my kids $1 for whoever found it. We prayed about it. And so I was waiting and waiting to post until I had some pictures from our trip. And then today I learned I left it at Cort's brothers house. YAYYYYYYYY!! I was worried it had fallen out of our car or my purse at a rest stop on our way home...so I will have to post more once I get it back. ;)

Recipes Please

2011-08-17T11:53:00.000-07:00

So so SO much going on. I need to post about Girl's Camp, then our Family vaca to San Diego. BUT since I am lazy bones today, being our first day back from our vaca and seeing as there is only a few days until school starts... I want to post about how my body is nutzo and I am thinking bedrest is in my near future. With that being said...I was thinking that until that happens, I should really make some freezer meals and prepare for being down for a while. I know some of you (Annie, Sarah) have posted some GREAT freezer recipes, but this is my plea to everyone to please e-mail me, post on fb or respond here with a simple and easy freezer recipe or two that you know of. I am going to look up some online, but coming from friends and family is always the best way!! So post away and thank you in advance! I will post more exciting stuff later.

Baby's Room

2011-08-09T11:01:00.001-07:00

Ahhh, another baby boy is on the way and where most people can slowly plan away for 9 months...I have to get things together a little sooner than the average gal for my early arrivals. I am not rushing, but I am getting busy trying to get things together for the baby. With every new baby comes a few changes to the nursery. I know, 4 boys could all use the same bedding, etc. But that is not me!! I am all about changing things around to make it unique to each baby. And come on, another boy does not mean "oh they can share clothes and bedding and you get to save lots of money." Yes, thats true. however, each new boy gets a few things that are just their own. I mean, come on now. I love to shop! Now, I must add that I have never quite loved the end result with my babies room. I like them, they are cute, but I have never really loved the room. So this time I really want to love the room! I am not going to go crazy money wise, in fact I want to make a lot of the things myself, as much as I can. So I am brainstorming ideas...

Here are a few that I love...

I really love the whole owl thing, as well as oranges, blues, greens and browns all together...

Do I go lighter owl or darker??

Love, LOVE this yellow and blue...

LOVE this shade of green, love the white, the elephants...ooooh so much to choose from!

I love doing the name this way! I always have their names displayed in their rooms, and this is really a fun way of doing it!

These are adorable birp cloths! Love them!!

Anyhow, just some ideas. So much fun!!! Getting excited!

Camping

2011-08-03T17:19:00.000-07:00

Last weekend we went camping as a family. We normally go camping at least 3-4 times during the summer- and we usually go with friends. But a lot of the mountains are closed right now from previous mudslides, weather, etc. AND this summer has been crazy busy and this was the first time we could go. It was really fun!

We had so many last minute changes in our plans, but it all worked out and we had so much fun! From roasting marshmellows to tin foil dinners- we had a great time!!

We went on a few walks/mini hikes.

And the next day, rather then packing up and heading home, we drove a little further down the road to discover a beautiful waterfall and a lake! It was amazing!!

We weren't prepared with clothes that could get wet or swimming suits- so we let the boys play a little in the water, but not much.

My 3 boys!

We finally took off Keatons shorts at the lake because they were so wet! The boys had a great time- and I did too! It was a very resfreshing, fun family weekend trip!

Lemonade Stand

2011-08-03T17:14:00.000-07:00

On Tuesday, as I am running around like a mad woman trying to get everything done for Girl's camp (the girls left today, I go first thing in the morning), my boys want to have a lemonade stand. The truth is, they have been wanting to do this all summer and I have not been willing to provide the time I would need to help them. I know, it sounds terrible- but really, we have just been super busy. So when they asked on Tuesday, my first thought was "no way." But the more I thought about it, the more I realized...minimal fighting between the boys, I would have to check on them and monitor, but really- this might work in my favor. So we put it together and they had a BLAST! 3 pitchers of lemonade and a few dollars they earned later, I got TONNNNNS done for Girl's Camp.

They were a little sad when I explained how they had to split the money they made, but it was still all-good to them!
When Keaton woke from his nap...he helped a lot by dumping out 6 cups of pre-served lemonade...that big stinker!!

All in all, a fun time. And now I am off to girls camp!

Still Shocked

2011-07-31T22:27:00.001-07:00

First comes the shock of this pregnancy, then comes the shock that this baby is another boy. It shouldn't have been a shock to me- but I seriously thought it was a girl- and so this week has been crazy to wrap my head around it. As I am sitting in sacrament today with my boys being crazy as always, I am thinking to myself REALLY...I mean REALLY? I am adding another boy to the mix of rowdiness!! And then I have to laugh. I really do have a great life. And this baby boy wanted to come to our family in such a miraculous way. I am so lucky. I am grateful. I am just still in shock. I am sure in time, just as with the pregnancy shock finally sinking in, another baby boy will start sinking in to my brain and I will start getting more and more excited. It's not that I am not excited now- I really love this little growing baby already, like I said in my earlier post, just a shock from different feelings I had. I am now trying to figure out how to move bedrooms around, what theme and colors to use for the baby's room, and a NAME. Oh boy. A name. Cort and I always disagree on names. With Brayden, we were totally unprepared for his arrival and were in full arguments about names before he was born. Then we had to decide quickly. Never again. With Keaton, we actively searched and talked well in advance in case he came early. So this baby, we are doing the same. The problem is my husband is just as picky and stubborn as me! There is no "you are going through all the pregnancy and labor, so you get to choose" kind of business in our household. My husband has to agree and won't budge. I can't play any kind of crying bit with him- he knows me too well! It's all good- cause I am just as stubborn to him with other things. We equal out very nicely. I just hope we can find a unique name for this unique baby.

Now! Time for me to put a million things aside and get to girls camp. I won't lie- I am excited, but seriously, SERIOUSLY can't wait for it to be over! No more meetings, planning, meetings, planning, crazy late night stressors to get things done. I will be a new woman once it is over! I CANT WAIT!!

And did I mention that I start progesterone shots this week? That will be a nice added flavor to my moodiness.

And did I mention I think I am getting another sinus infection?? Just in time for girls camp!

I am one crabby lady! Hopefully the next post will be more exciting ;)

Oh, and PS, sorry that I made everyone wait SO LONG when I posted on facebook what I was having. I was seriously on the phone for like 4 hours after my appointment and couldn't catch a break to get online... ;) Have a great week everyone!!

Boy oh BOY!!

2011-07-26T20:19:00.000-07:00

Well today I learned the wonderful news that I am having another BOY. Was I surprised...Yes, (although I know I shouldn't have been!) but I am thrilled. I love boys, I love MY boys and I am excited.

But I am not going to lie. There is some venting that needs to be done!

I totally 100% thought I was having a girl. My husband and I BOTH had dreams before we even knew we were pregnant, (But I already was and just didn't know it) that we had a little girl. Today my mom told me that she also had dreamt I had a girl. I had several moments during this pregnancy where I would swear to you that I had confirmation and visions that I was having a girl. It was so weird because I knew Kyler was a boy, I just knew it. But with Brayden and Keaton, I wasn't sure. I really never had direct feelings either way, but deep down suspected they might be boys. Not this time. I knew it was a girl, I just knew it. I told myself NOT to let myself go there. I told myself, don't get worked up that it's a girl!! I knew I could be setting myself up. Every.single.person that I have talked to at one point or another in this pregnancy has said "maybe this is your girl." EVERY SINGLE PERSON. At church, in the neighborhood, friends, everywhere! And there have been many times I have said, "seriously, please don't keep getting me worked up that it's a girl." I got excited. I *almost* bought girl clothes- seriously! There were times when I saw something girly and could swear that inside me tingled that this baby was a girl. And did I ever mention before that I am a super raging hormonal monster? This pregnancy my hormones have been off the charts...which deep down I believed could be in connection to the girl I thought I was having...Crazy thoughts!!

So to say that although I tried to convince myself to "not go there" and not think anything until I knew is an understatement because I really truly thought this baby was a girl. So I was shocked today. Really didn't even know how to react. I saw it. The manhood. It was clear. And the doctor just patted me and said "wow, clear as day." and I was silent. I am sorry! I was silent.

I feel really guilty even writing about it, because yes, then I did cry. I can't have normal pregnancies with normal healthy full term babies. I can't keep trying for the girl I dream of having some day. I just can't. And deep down, especially since this pregnancy happened the way it did, I have just kind-of thought this had to be our last no matter what. So I had to have a few moments of "wow, okay" and crying to my mom to move on from my girl feelings. It's not like sheer utter disappointment- it was just disbelief and shock. It was so different than what I had felt. And I am scared. 4 boys people! 4 mini Cortney Larson boys. Do any of you really know how Cortney was as a child. Oh his mother will tell you stories. And I have 3 of them already!! They are wonderful and I love it. But it was a little hard to accept that things were so different than what I had pictured.

But if you really know me, you know how much I just love babies. Especially little boy babies. Please don't take my venting the wrong way. I have dreamed of having another baby, boy or girl for so long and Cort and I just never thought we were going to have another one because of our situation, so this is truly a blessing in our lives. If the Lord is going to send me another boy the way that he did, I know this is meant to be.

I am going to embrace and love this truly miracle baby no matter what- and truly, all I really want in my heart is a healthy as-close-to-full-term-as-possible baby. Really, truly. I am so excited to see if this one will keep Brayden the only blonde in the family and to see whose eyes he will have. I am glad I can finally say "he" instead of "the baby in my belly, or it." I am grateful and lucky because I have such amazing boys. It will be wonderful.

I seriously can't wait to start bonding with this angel inside me.

And now, I can start making plans for our own baseball team. ;)

I know, I know

2011-07-22T13:26:00.001-07:00

Alright, I know my last post seemed really Debi-Downer. Other than the awesome fun time I had when my sister was here, last week was terrible. Really. BUTTTTT, things are much better this week. Thank heavens!!

So this week my goal has been to really sulk up every second with my kids. Let the house go, have fun together. Because I had noticed that in all my moodiness, I have found myself saying "no" to almost everything my kids ask me. Mom, can I play with a friend? Mom, can I have this? Mom can I have that? And really, a lot of those things I still should say no to, but I can do it in a better way. Since when do I say no to all these fun things my kids want to do?. It's not fair to them. So I have been making lists of fun things we can do, answers I can give them instead of no...Like saying "well we can't play with a friend right now but let's play with playdough!" And giving them other ideas help keep them from the extreme boredome they have been facing. I feel bad, I am just so dang tired all the time! And moody! And never able to get enough sleep, EVER! So it shows through my most pleasant personality. No wonder my kids fight and are grouchy! I have been not showing them quite the love they deserve.

So I have been working on it. I am even reading some books to help me with dealing with some of the things that happen specifically to BOYS as they get older. I have two issues with the book- 1. I fall asleep pretty much any time I read anything. It's going to take me a long time to get through this. And 2. The beginning of this book basically is every mother's fear: "boys are always treated differently because they have a harder time sitting still, containing their energy, they struggle with self esteem, they are viewed differently in the world." ETC. It's hard to read that. Especically when I have 3 boys! Maybe 4 soon! But this book came highly recommended and I know that it tells me these things to buld me up and help me recognize how much extra love and encouragement and support they need. Which in turns only makes me feel like a failure as a mother because I don't think I have given my boys, especially my oldest, that kind of patience, love and encouragement. The good news is, I still have been a pretty good mom and can't beat myself up over this- what I can do is start now at working on these things. And doing better. And that's what I am trying to do!! I am actually quite encouraged that I am not alone in my feelings about having a hard time figuring out how to handle boy situations. What the heck am I going to do when my kids get old enough to really start to "get it" with certain things?? You know, like where babies really do come from?? AHHHHHH. I am scared to death! But at least I know I am on the right track doing what I can do as a parent to educate myself and teach my kids the best I can (don't worry folks, they are not ready for "that" talk yet...at least I think...) Thank heavens, again.

Anyways, enough rambling from me. I really just am a super duper hormonal monster that is trying to control it because I know it is because I am pregnant. And I hate to say this agian, I really do, but there are some days I still can't even believe I am pregnant! Really. I still can't believe how this all happened and some days I find myself going "really, there is really a baby growing inside me??" For reals! It is crazy! I really hope that some day I will be back to my normal, not crazy to everyone self. In the meantime, you will continue to read crazy posts from me. ;)

Life

2011-07-18T14:02:00.001-07:00

This crazy boy just went in for his annual heart echo and EKG up at Primary Children's Medical Center. Everything looks just about the same as it did last year, which is GREAT because the problem has not gotten worse. The doctor estimates at this rate, he won't need to have surgery until his late teens. This is good news. Every year we go in and axiously await whatever the doctor has to say, but deep down, I always know that these are the years we have with Brayden to run and jump and play. And when he is older, no more of that until his heart issues are resolved. So maybe I let him get away with being a little more wild because of this?? I don't know. But either way, I am glad to hear that things look good so far.

Now as for everything else in my life? I'm pretty much a big mess. There is so much going on that I can't even begin to talk about, but what I can say is- pregnant women handle enough just being pregnant and trying to deal with hormones and other crazy things (speaking of which, starting next week I will be getting progesterone shots every week=- yay for even more crazy hormones...) Anyways, but to have extra crap in my life on top of it is not helping. Especially since I am trying to keep this baby in longer...not have the baby sooner due to extreme stress...which I have had. Alright, I am not going to ramble on forever about it. I just know that I am so grateful to have such a wonderful family who is always there for me, who always has my back, who puts judgements aside, who I know I can always and forever trust. I have recently come to be more grateful to those in my life who are truly there for me.

---So hopefully the next post I can tell you all about my fun times with my sister in town and maybe even what gender of baby we are having...hopefully!---

Need a laugh today?

2011-07-06T14:17:00.000-07:00

So my dear sweet Kyler graduated from 1st grade this year...and with that came a program. And after the cute program (which was dedicated to Mother's), they directed all Mother's to a wall where their kids had painted beautiful portraits of their mothers.

As I am approaching the wall, many mom's come away laughing. Kids at this age are very creative, very cute with their art- and so let's just say I did not know what to expect...but then again, I did. But I seriously had no idea...

It's okay. Go ahead, Laugh your head off. I did. And I still do, even when I even think about this picture. And can I add that most of the mom's coming away from that way were laughing at THIS picture!! Then they saw me take it and we all couldn't stop laughing. I think Kyler captured my eyelashes and jewlery perfectly! What about my eyebrows above and below my eyes? Just perfect!! ;) I love it- kids are so dang cute~~

Changes

2011-07-03T09:08:00.000-07:00

Do I dare say I *think* I am past the super duper sicker than I have ever been with any pregnancy phase? I think that I finally am. The last week especially I have been feeling pretty good. It is weird. I am so used to starting something, or planning to take the kids somewhere, etc. and then BOOM, I am just so sick I can't even think of anything else. AND it would last all day and all night and pretty much never ended. It wasn't fun. And by far the worst of any pregnancy. Add to that the fact that I am a hormonal raging monster...yeah, that. I have not been my best self, that is for sure. But I think things are coming around. I am almost 14 weeks and of course, I am showing for reals now. I think it's obvious- and anyone who knew me before I got pregnant should know I am not just getting fat everywhere, its obvious in my belly! ;)

Soooo....what does this mean? PROJECTS! Luckily I have been inspired/motivated by company coming: My husbands family on Monday, my sister and her family next week and one of my bestest friends Kyra the week after. Company always motivates me to clean, but there was some real organization that has needed to be done for some time now- and I finally am feeling good enough to do it.

In the past few days I have organized the pantry (which I pretty much do every 6 months or so). But can I tell you that this time I really changed things around. Something happened the other day that really opened my eyes to how much MORE my boys could be doing for themselves...and I am really cheating them by not letting them be more independent. They could totally get their own bowls of ceral in the mornings (not Keaton of course, but the other two)...and their own lots of things...but I have just always done it. And there was a day this last week I was forced to put my feet up and make the kids do more and I realized that if I were to just show them a little more of how to do things themselves, as well as moving things around in the pantry so it's more at their level, things would be much better. AND let's be honest, I am totally preparing to be on bed rest at some point in this pregnancy. This will make things a lot easier if I start transitioning them now to do more for themselves. So , back to the list.

I have cleaned out and oraganized 75% of the kitchen cabinets. Things were just getting shoved into places when in reality, there is a lot of extra room if we just put things in nicely. The other 25% didn't need to be done! ;)

I have cleaned out Kyler and Brayden's closets and organized them...although we are going to be moving rooms around, soooo this will all be re-done anyways. But at least now I know where everything is and it will be a smoother transition.

It has only been a week of feeling good, so I am just getting started! Now I plan to:

Organize the basement- there is so much that we can give away/have a yard sale, etc.

Go through ALL baby stuff...I will probably wait a few more weeks until I find out what I am having...if it's a boy, I will wash and start going through everything and decide what to keep, etc.

If it's a girl, I will probably give away a lot more and store things differently.

Once I find out the gender, we will also be doing a lot of changes around the upstairs. Rooms are going to get moved around. The crib will be set back up, the changing table, possibly some painting. There is so much to be done! And while most people wait a little ways longer in their pregnancy to do a lot of it, I don't have that luxary...especially when bed rest is expected! So I am getting as much done now as possible and am hoping to have it all done before baby-kins makes the arrival and/or bed rest. I am excited, especially now that I am not so sick and can actually think about these things.

Much much more to do, but too much to list for now. Hopefully I can post some pictures as I work on some of the more fun projects!

Larson Family Reunion

2011-06-27T17:03:00.000-07:00

We made our Annual trip to Arizona for Cortney's family reunion and it was great as always. The only bummer was Cort's parents couldn't come this year. But as usual, we had a great time. This is Cort's brother and his family as well our family.
There were so many fun games! This one some of the men

Kyler and some of the other kids had to get the oreos from the top of their heads into their mouths.

Kyler had trouble not cheating...

The kids had a super awesome water fight that resulted in grown adult men (and when I say grown, I mean some of these men were in their 60s) running after each other with buckets of water. It was awesome!! Cort got soaked by one of his uncles.

Waterballoon toss with sheets. Awesome.

There were pinatas for the little ones and for the bigger kids.

Keaton with his cousin Madi! All in all, we had a great time and are so grateful to be part of an amazing family.

Summer Fun

2011-06-27T16:47:00.000-07:00

This summer has been SO busy! I cannot even believe how crazy. Here's one of the fun things we have done...My in-laws invite us every year to their neighbors barn/yard to touch and feed their animals. It's great- the kids love it! And this year Keaton was old enough to hold the animals and enjoy it.

The kids had a great time and it was just the very beginning of our summer fun!

Worst Mom Award

2011-06-10T14:44:00.001-07:00

Although I have been feeling MUCH better the past couple of days (from the nausea), to say that my brain has been working only half of the time is an understatement. Yes, I have pregnancy brain, but I also have mom brain, Liz brain, mom of 3 boys brain, wife of Cortney brain, ETC. I can go on and on but I won't. SO, the mistake I made the other day was actually quite simple and something that I can honestly say I HAD NO IDEA what we were getting into. I was taking some neighborhood boys on a small "hike", but it is really just a cool walk through this foresty path by our house. It's part of a neighborhood summer program. So I had 10 boys including my own, yes, that's right, 10 BOYS! But they were all great. We were going along on the hike and when we got halfway and I let them have fruit snacks and a capri sun, the MOSQUITOS came out from the woods and ate everyone alive. Most of us just had little ones on our arms and legs...and I was going around, helping the boys hit them away as I protect myself as well. But my sweet little Keaton. His blood must just be sweeter than most, because the next day HIS SWEET FACE was COVERED in bites, his eye swollen...well, you can see a little of it yourself:

This picture just doesn't do any of it justice. (he wasn't coopertaing and neither was the sun or my camera) It only really captures his eye. So the kicker is, as I am out in public feeling totally terrible as a mother, everyone I have told where we have gotten bitten has said "oh yeah, that place is filled with mosquitos, I always bring spray" and I just feel so bad I didn't realize or know...even though I have been there several times before. I know, it's just a simple mistake that any mom would make. I just feel so bad with how many kids I was responsible for, making that mistake. THEN, add to that the absolutely terrible diaper rash Keaton had yesterday. The poor kid had a little tummy ache or something and kept filling his diaper. I was careful to get it right away, but it was real acidic or something because it was red from the very first diaper change. And so by the middle of the day yesterday, his poor face swollen, he's on benadryl for the bites and a little sleepy, AND he is walking like he was riding a horse all day. Most of the day he just cried and I held him. I just felt like such a bad Mom. I know I'm not. But I certainly didn't deserve the mother of the year award yesterday.

On a brighter note, Keaton is MUCHHHHH better today on both accounts! And I am feeling better about my role as a mother ;)

The BIG Shocker, Part 2

2011-06-07T11:00:00.000-07:00

Wow, Do I feel the love or what?!!!! It is so great! Thanks to everyone for the great comments and the love that you have truly shown me.

So I want to fill in a few more details with my story that I cannot even believe I forgot to put in my original post anyways. But it was soooo long that it is probably best I broke it up.

First and foremost is that ever since I was a little kid, I have had a small bladder. I'm sorry this is TMI for some people, but I am not embarrassed by it. I hate it, and I have been embarrassed by it many times, but I can remember when I was 12 and going to the movies with some friends. I went to the bathroom before, during AND after the movie. It's just something I have lived with for a looong time. Well, obviously, after having kids, it has gotten worse. It's not like I have accidents or anything like that- I just have to GO all the time! So, one day about 9 months ago or so, I was at my docs office for a thyroid check and mentioned to him my frustrations. He had me try a bladder medication that just helps me be able to go longer in between trips to the bathroom without retaining water or anything. it was AWESOME~! Sooooo, fastforward to when I did not know I was pregnant (but I would have been 4 weeks at the time, just barely pregnant) and I am filling a new perscription for the medicine because my old one expired. After a few days of taking it, I seriously thought the doc had given me a lesser dose or something because I could swear I actually had to go MORE than normal, even on the medicine! What? So the good news is after a few more days I stopped taking the medicine. Deep down I believe that subconsiously my body was telling me to stop taking it because it was not a good medicine to take while pregnant, but it's weird because I really am surprised that I didn't take it for longer just to see if it would help. Guess the pregnancy was kicking in big time because MAN OH MAN I had to go ALL THE TIME. Worse than any of the other times I have been pregnant...But this experience is another sign that everything was in the works and I just did not know the plan at the time...CRAZY how everything has come together.
So, what was Cortney's reaction?? Well, normally I do something cute to tell him I am pregnant, but seeing as I had been crying pretty much all day, and was freaking out, and this was not planned and totally crazy news...I knew he would be shocked as well. I just asked him to follow me upstairs after dinner. In my closet I pulled out the two pregnancy tests, and as I was pulling them out, he said "oh, your pregnant." And I said Yes. I think he maybe didn't believe me or didn't belive IT until we talked and I told him about both tests and could now see all the signs. And as weboth sat down and talked, let me tell- only when I have something truly important to talk to my hubby about do the kids come in a thousand times, jumping on the bed, trying hard to do their best to get us to stop talking and play with them. So to say that it only added to the already freaked out mood would be an understatement. I was definetly frustrated and just wanted to vent to Cort. --SIDE NOTE: Seeing as I have been more emotional these days, Keaton has started doing THE CUTEST thing in the whole world. he comes up to me, puts both hands on my face and says, "Mom, are you okay Mom?" and keeps asking until I say "yes, I'm okay." Where did he learn that? I dunno, but it MELTS my heart!! Okay, back to the story. We talked through it. If you didn't realize before that the timing of this pregnancy was definetly different than what we would have planned, you should know it now! Of course I am grateful and know the Lord has a plan, but the reason we had put off researching adoption and foster to adopt thus far was Cort's health. It has been a really rough last year especially- He IS finally on the road to recovery and we think the surgery was sucessful, but he is still playing it really safe and we are trying to be careful he doesn't have any more vertigo attacks. SOOOOOO, when we were talking about me being pregnant, he was concerned about him being sick, me being sick or on bedrest, and who is going to take care of us? We only have his parents here who are really able to help (his sister will have moved away by then) and his Dad just had back surgery. And there is only so much they can do! And quite frankly, it is hard to ask someone to come in and help with throwing up. And we live in an amazing neighborhood that I know would go through leaps and bounds to help us, but it is hard living that way- relying on others to help you get through things you think you should be able to take care of yourself. So we talked a lot about this. And a lot about just the SHOCK. After a few days of us going back and forth about "wow, isn't this so crazy, how are we going to do this"...some things started to click for the both of us.
I would share little personal things with him, little feelings that I had that things were for the best. A week after we found out we were able to go to them temple and that was wonderful. We both had great feelings there that everything was going to be okay. There are so many little personal experiences we have both had that have made things easier to deal with. I think Cortney took the shock harder than even me in the beginning because he was so worried about both of us being sick. I know it has been hard for him, and now its hard for me and so we are just trying to help each other! But somehow, so far, it has worked out.

And speaking of being sick, I feel bad for Cortney that he has had to put up with my moaning, grumbling and whinning about it. I never ever really feel good anymore, ever. And it is the worst at night. His meals have suffered, he has had to do more around the house and more with the kids to help me. Once I get past this sick phase (that is assuming I will, please please please!), then I am hoping we will be out of the "still in shock" phase as well. Because I am still in shock! And I think sometimes Cortney is too.

Did I ever mention that I am STILL in shock?! Some days everything is so real and I get excited and worried at the same time. And other days I seriously think "is this really happening"...I know it sounds crazy that it has taken me over a month to let is sink in, but I don't even think it has sunk in YET! It is so amazing how quickly life changes. I am just so grateful Heavenly Father, my family and friends are all here to help me through them~ ;)

The BIG Shocker

2011-06-05T17:47:00.000-07:00

Frist of all, I have an announcement. It's big. It's shocking to some and it was mostly shocking to me and my hubby. I will tell you what it is, then spend the rest of this post expressing all my deepest feelings regarding everything...cause that's what my blog is for.

Soooooo drumroll Please...

I am PREGNANT.

The main reason this is so shocking is because I was on BIRTH CONTROL and have never missed a pill. I have taken birth control for the past 13 years (other than when I was trying to get pregnant or pregnant). Even when I am nursing, I am on the mini-pill. So to say that I was and still am shocked to learn this news is a huge understatement.

So my whole story starts with me making an appointment. I was talking with Cortney about 4 months ago about going into my high-risk OB to talk about my future. I have never gone in and actually learned what my chances are of having another preemie. I have not been ready to hear what he had to say, good or bad. All Cort and I knew was we were probably not having another biological child...but if we did, it would probably be once Keaton was in preschool in case we had another preemie. We had talked about adoption. We had talked about foster-to-adopt. We knew there was at least one more child for us, that we weren't "done" but we knew that we could not go through the whole 3 months of having a baby in the NICU and all that comes with that, again. So I made the appointment and they scheduled it out about 3 months for May 31st. No big deal.

Fast forward 2 1/2 months later. Cort is in Costa Rica for a week for work. I am worried about him. I am worried he is going to be sick while he is there with no one to take care of him. Luckily he was great the whole time- but we had little contact with each other. And I was worried. TOO worried to realize already that I was 2 weeks late on my cycle. I thought about it once, but then it left me immedietly because I never thought in a million years I could be pregnant. Never.in.a.million.years. And then Cort gets back. And that night I am brushing my teeth and I gag. That's weird, I think to myself. I always gag when I am pregnant. I then go on to talk to Cort about my recent insomnia. I get it from time to time- but I get it especially when I am pregnant. Again, there was no connection in my brain that I could possibly be. I really did not even think about it. The next day, with a terrible sinus infection starting and miserable allergies, I decide to skip aerobics and run some errands in the morning. I am at the dollar store in the check out line and I see a pregnancy test. Oh good, I think. This will be good peace of mind. Seriously, this is what I am thinking. Peace of mind. I don't give it another thought, and don't even remember that I bought the test until a few hours later when I am finally digging through the bags of stuff I bought to put away. Oh, yes I should take this.

After said test is taken and I am washing my hands, I am watching the test finish within seconds. WHAT?!!!!!!!!!!! Okay, wait, this is a dollar store test. It's probably a junk test. Deep down I think I knew the test was right, but I couldn't believe it. How could it be?? The truth is, all my pregnancy tests have been bought at the dollar store...but still- this one couldn't be right. After Keaton woke up from his nap, I loaded up the kids and went to Smiths to buy another one. After that one was positive, just as clearly as the first one, the real freaking out began.

Now first I want to say that I am so lucky to be able to concieve. There are many friends of mine who have struggled, tried for years, been on fertility treatments with no luck. And here I am, freaking out about being pregnant. The truth is, if I didn't have preemies, Cort and I would have been pregnant on purpose by now (or at least we would have been trying). I LOVE babies more than anything in the world. Anyone who truly knows me knows that I have spent many hours crying, praying because I truly wish I could have a full term child again. But when Keaton was in the NICU, there was a day that I truly did not know how much more I could take of the heartache I was feeling, and I turned to Cort and said "I can't go through this again." And that has stuck with me.

So after a lot of freaking out, worrying, crying, pacing the hallways, I had a few personal experiences of comfort. I knew that this was meant to be.

Now, of course this is meant to be. If the Lord is going to send me a baby when I am on birth control AND have only one ovary, then it is MEANT TO BE. Buuuuuuut, can I just tell you how much of a shock to my system this has been? One minute life is going one way, and the next minute, everything in our future has changed. And when I say everything, I mean everything. Because for me, pregnancy isn't just a normal "keep doing what your doing" kind of thing. Because I have placental abruptions, I have to stop 3/4 of the work out's I have been doing. And selfishly, this has been hard for me. Of course I have done it with no question, but it was hard mentally for me. I believe there is so much mental preparation that goes with getting pregnant. You prepare yourself that you are not going to be able to do certain things, that your body is going to change, in my case I will get realllllllly big everywhere and gain back what I worked so hard to lose- and so when you do become pregnant, you accept these things. Since I had no expectation or preparation for this- it has been hard for me to think about getting big again, and epecially to drop my daily routines of zumba, aerobics, stregnth training.

Both my primary doctor and high risk OB have said specifically, 30 mins tops of cardio, low impact, walking, swimming. NO squats, lunges or running. Or anything that would get my heart rate up. Or anything that would put any pressure on my abdomen. Nice, so pretty much 99.9% of what I am doing I have to stop.

Don't get me wrong- I will do whatever is most important to have a long and healthy pregnancy. It is not even a question. Once agian, this just falls into the category of: I am still in shock and trying to adjust to these unexpected life changes.

Now, can I tell you now that so far this has been the hardest pregnancy I have had? My morning sickness is ALL day sickness and it is the worst it has been with any of my children. Just opening the fridge to different smells makes me want to vomit. I feel gross pretty much all the time. Like, seriously. It is sad how many people have asked me if I am okay because I just look....well, sick. I snack little snacks all day long to help things- and it is unfortunetly whatever I can tolerate at the time. I must say, sugar is not really an issue, but certainly salty is! I can go from eating some fresh steamed corn, to salad, to chips and salsa, to just chips! Sour candies have helped as well, but it is just whatever my body will let me eat at that time without throwing it up.

Did I mention that I am still in shock?! So my due date has been anywhere from Jan 6 to Jan 12th. Sooooo, if I go early that is a thanksgiving or christmas baby! WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?!!!!!

I still just can't even believe it. I have been to my regular OB twice and my high risk once and as of right now I am 10 weeks tomorrow (although the appointment before this they said I was a due a week later, meaning 1 week less along in pregnancy). It has changed, but the most recent is what I want to go with! Being further along means less time sick, right? Let's hope!

Did I mention my hormones are crazy? One minute I am laughing and the next I look at my hubby and cry telling him I am sorry I am such a lazy bum complainer sitting on the couch all day long. My motivation to do anything normal has gone out the window- although I do try to push myself because I find if I keep busy, it helps with the nausea.

So I have told my family and most of my friends, but the truth had to come out because everyone keeps asking me why I am only do half of my normal workout, and why I keep getting sick- and let's just face it, this is my 4th time around and I am already SHOWING. Not like "is she?" kind of showing, I can still hide it. But it is there. believe me.

And I just can't keep my mouth shut any longer because this is crazy news!!

And while I am still in shock, still trying to process everything. I know this is a huge blessing. And this will be a miracle to my family. Unfortunetly my chances of having another preemie are pretty high. When I went to that appointment on the 31st, the doctor came in and said "I thought this was a consultation to talk about your future, but I guess you jumped the gun and went for it, eh?" and I said, "hey, I thought the same as you and got the shock of my life doc." Then of course, I told him the story. This crazy story. And he told me the bad news. Prepare for doing nothing, prepare for bedrest. Prepare for a preemie. Whoa. Did not see that coming. I really truly believed in my heart I could have another full term. And I am still hanging onto that. I told him I am believing in my heart that things can be different. And that's what I will hold on to for now. And when/if things change along the way, we will deal with it then. I know the Lord will not give me anything I cannot handle. And I am grateful for this change. I am still trying to embrace it, but I am grateful for it.

So baby Larson #4, Boy or Girl? Well, I know my chances of having another boy are pretty darn great. So I am preparing for a boy and will just be pleasantly surprised if I get a girl. Cort says since he wasn't "trying" on purpose, maybe he let the girl genes go through...I just can't know right now either way! I just want a healthy baby! That's all I want!! Did I mention I am still in shock?

And there you have it. The longest post in the world. I am sure there will be many more rantings from in the future about my constant shock and disbelief that I am actually preggers. But it is so. And I working myself up to be excited. It will be great! Just pray for me!!!!! ;)
Love to you all.

Move over Preschool, Hello Kindergarden!

2011-05-24T14:37:00.000-07:00

I can't believe Brayden is done with Preschool and moving on to Kindergarden! He had Preschool Graduation this week and it was adorable! Brayden felt truly special...can I brag and tell you that he has insisted on wearing the tie I made him for Easter for every special occasion since...it's so cute! Here he is doing the graduation walk...

Here he is singing/performing...

Taking the final bow Family picture after (minus Kyler who was at school...and keep in mind it was windy and raining when you look at my hair-POOF) Grandma Sue (Cort's mom) and Brayden together
I think the only thing left to say is...I am getting OLD! ;)

Routines

2011-05-17T12:56:00.001-07:00

This beautiful stinker has been giving me trouble during nap time. He loves to play with his brothers too much- so it's hard for him to stop playing and take a nap. He has been fighting me and let me tell you, I have NEVER had a child this young fight me on naps! So most days he still takes a nap with no fights, but this particular day, he fought me...and fought me and fought me and I finally gave in. And then while watching cartoons an hour later, he fell asleep on the couch.
Then another day he fought me yet again- but this time I thought he had finally given in and gone to sleep, then I peeked in on him and he was just playing. I should have just let him play and he would have gone to sleep- but I let him go outside with his brothers and get wet running through the sprinklers...so then an hour later, where do I find him? Asleep on the front porch in his towel! Oh why did I not get my camera right then and take a picture? I do not know. But I did take one after I moved him to the couch. Not quite as cute as the front porch, but still adorable. This little guy melts my heart even when he is a stinker!

I really must be doing something right!!

2011-05-08T20:10:00.001-07:00

My kids filled out the cutest survey on me today...

Brayden:
My mom's name is: Elizabeth
My mom always says: Happy
My mom teaches me how to: How to Juggle....(what, I only wish I could juggle!)
My mom's favorite food is: strawberries
My mom's favorite thing to do is: clean
My mom is special because: She loves me.
Kyler:
My mom's name is: Lizabeth (he wrote the answers himself, which makes it even cuter!)
My mom always says: Love
My mom teaches me how to: Not to smoke
My mom's favorite food is: salad
My mom's favorite thing to do is: sumba (zumba)
My mom is special because: her is nice

I am so impressed with my kids answers (other than the juggling, silly Brayden!). I can't believe how right they were with most of their answers! It makes me feel like I must be doing something right...so cute! Made my day!

~Mothers~

2011-05-08T09:49:00.001-07:00

Cort has been out of town all week and got back around 1 in the morning this morning. The kids and I made the best of the week by keeping busy with house projects, spending a lot of time playing outside, and of course, lots of baseball. It actually turned out to be a great week but I am so glad my hubs is home safe.

As I think about Mother's Day today, I cannot help to have a wave of saddness at my Grandmother not being with us anymore. More than the hint of saddness I feel for myself, I feel it for my Mom who is spending her first Mother's Day without her own Mother. I cannot imagine how hard that must be. But I know that it makes this day that much more special to me as I am lucky enough to have my mother still alive and well AND that I am blessed enough for her to be an amazing wonderful person.

I am blessed to have three healthy and strong children. I am blessed to be able to play with them, read to them, make memories with them. I love being a Mom. Even though some days I just cannot seem to figure out how I will make it through when the kids are fighting, the house is a mess and life just seems chaos. Then I think...would I have it any other way? Nope. I am so blessed. And I get to stay home with them thanks to my hard working husband who goes above and beyond to make that possible for me.

I am just feeling very blessed. I hope all of you out there are having a wonderful day.

Calling All Moms of Thumb Suckers....

2011-05-04T21:53:00.001-07:00

Alright mom's of thumb suckers- tell me your tricks. Keaton will be 3 in August and I think the time is nearing for us to attack this...especially since I imagine it might take some time to break the habit. So please, share your tricks, thoughts, secrets, ideas, etc, etc! Thank you...

Changes*

2011-05-03T09:57:00.000-07:00

Cortney is out of town all week. Last week Keaton was sick. Life has been busy, crazy, with baseball. Yesterday I ate three 500 calories each cupcakes. YUP. Seriously.

So I am going to publicly beat myself up and then tell you about the changes I am making.

I feel like I am in pretty good shape. I still have areas I am working on and I hope that even when I am happiest with myself, I don't ever let myself "go"...which is kind of what happened last week. You know, I was just having a hard week with Keaton being so sick and needy. So its okay to miss a work out and for things to not go according to plan...but then I let my eating go. Like, really bad. I made these super amazing cupcakes that my friend has made and gave me the recipe for. They are seriously like 500 calories for ONE cupcake. Seriously. Are they worth it...well YES if you have worked out and have the self control to have ONE! But then there is me who has missed a bunch of my normal classes and have snacked more around the house out of pure boredome from being home with a sick kid. Sooooo I make these cupcakes and they make double what a normal recipe would make. So I make up plates to give out to people...and slowly the plates get smaller and smaller with me slowly eating these amazing cupcakes!!

Oh boy. So yesterday I missed aerobics yet again for something that was totally not worth it by the way, and felt so depressed that I had missed again AND had no motivation to work out at home AND then I ate 3 cupcakes. Not in a row- but throughout the day. You know, I normally eat healthy and so doing something like that to my body literally made me sick. Even though by the time I went to bed it had been like 6 hours since I had eaten the last cupcake (which btw, a neighbor stopped by at one point and I shoved the remaining 6 cupcakes on a plate and forced her to take them), I felt so gross. Literally, gross. Yucky, icky. And add to that the guilt from not working out.

So last night when I was laying in bed feeling so gross, I decided to get up and run this morning. I couldn't go till after the kids are in school since Cort is gone, but I did it. I called a friend, she went with me and pushed me- it was awesome. I felt so great. 4 miles isn't very far- but considering the state I was in yesterday, this was good. And it felt great. We even did 30 second sprints in the end at an incline of 10. It feels awesome. And it motivates me to get back on track with my eating and every day normal healthier living.

So this is it. I had put it on my blog so I have to get back to eating better. I HAVE to cause I will go crazy is I don't!! And now all YOU know, so I have to.

So what does it for you? What is YOUR motivation?? Have a great week everyone!

The Potty Problem

2011-04-27T15:27:00.000-07:00

You know how your friends who are mom's that have kids in school have told you that everything changes once your kids start school? And you're like "okay, yah, I know" but deep down you're thinking how life *should* get easier because you are down one child during the day so you don't really know what they have to complain about?? Yah, that. I TOTTTALLLLLY "get it" now and understand how enormously complicated everything becomes...not to mention HOMEWORK, which, btw, is really for the parents.

So just last week I learned that Kyler (7) has been "holding it" ALL DAY until he gets home from school because the toilets at school are gross. WHAT?!!! He will pee all day long with no problems and run out without flushing, but only ONE time in the entire school year this year did he go to the bathroom #2 in the toilet at school. ONE TIME!! I always noticed how he walked through the door after school and headed straight to the bathroom, I just assumed it was his time of the day to go. But wow! He says whenever he goes in the bathroom the toilets are always full of icky grossness so he holds it. I told him he should flush it and then go, but the thought of that grosses him out. I cannot say I blame him at all. I just don't think he should hold it that long either. And I am sad that I am just now learning about this considering the school year is almost over. CRAZY! We are working it through though...hence the one time he has gone now...I still can't get over it.

*SIGH*- So it's true. Everything, and I do mean everything, changes once you have a kid in school. You will just have to see for yourself.

PS.*****Please keep your fingers crossed that I can go to Zumba tonight folks. I am having major withdrawl!!******

Easter Sunday

2011-04-25T11:58:00.001-07:00

I must admit, I wasn't quite as organized and ready for Easter this year as I thought I was. For example- I totally forgot to do baskets for Cortney and me...but I had the kids done no problem. I guess thats who really counts, but I try never to forget to include Cort and I on stuff like that. Anyways, I also made the boys ties! It was awesome. My awesome friend Christy has 4 boys of her own and makes amazing things- but the best part is that they are simple- and my friend hosted a class for those of us who wanted to learn and showed us step by step. They were so much easier than I thought- and as long as you follow the steps- they turn out great!!! I am quite proud ;)

So here is Brayden being his silly typical self for a photo with his basket...

Kyler with his ;)

I tried and tried to get one of Keaton but he would not look up for more than one second! Every single one was a complete blurr. BUT I didnt push it too hard considering he woke up, came down and found his basket and BEFORE having any candy proceded to throw up all over. POOR KID! The flu again? Really? But the weird part is he didnt cry, he didnt lay down, he just kept playing. He barely ate anything all day, but no fever. Just weird.
So I still dressed him up nice and we all went to sacrament together, but we did not want to send him to nursery with whatever bug he had, so Cort took him home and put him to bed.
But here they are: Dont the ties look great!!! I know, Keatons is huge- but I really did make it that way on purpose. There is something so stinking cute about a little boy with a big tie. It's a weakness of mine really- I know some people think it looks tacky, or crazy but I LOVE IT!! My little men, all of them!

This one is so great of Kyler and Brayden...how come all three boys don't cooperate all the time for pictures?!!

And that's that! So Keaton woke up this morning with a fever. And drank two full sippy cups of water/juice and then threw it up everywhere. Poor kid. He seriously cant afford to lose any weight. And when he is sick, he is so sweet. He just wants to cuddle and be sweet. He even says please and thank you still to everything. He has been asleep since 10:30...and it's 1:00 as I am typing this.

Lets hope it doesn't last long!

You Gotta Have Friends!

2011-04-23T16:28:00.001-07:00

I am lucky to have great friends in many places. And every other year or so my high school friend Marisa comes to Utah for something and I get to see her! It is so great to have facebook, e-mail, blogs and other such resources to keep in touch with friends we otherwise would not get to talk to as much. I LOVE it when someone calls and says they are stopping through so we can have a short and sweet visit (of course I love long visits too!;)) Anyways, it was very short, about 2 hours together, but it was great!

And of course every time we talk, we wish we lived closer together so we could actually see each other more than every few years!
But we will take what we can get!

I feel so blessed to have such great friends everywhere in my life! Thanks Marisa for another great visit! Love ya girl!

Do you need to laugh today?

2011-04-20T14:10:00.000-07:00

Brayden: "Mom, remember that hooker I played with the other day and got in trouble?"
Me: "the hooker?....do you mean the hook?
Brayden: "Yeah mom, that hooker thing that I broke."
Me " Brayden, it's a HOOK!"
ooooooh the things kids say...still can't get this one out of my head!

Hope you are having as good of a day as me! ;)

Baseball has begun!

2011-04-17T20:29:00.001-07:00

2 years ago we put the boys in soccer and it was a disaster! Part of it could have been that 2 weeks into it I had Keaton and was back and forth from the NICU, buuuuuut, I really think they were too young, not ready and just not interested. So we held off on sports for a few years and thought this year we could try a new sport! Baseball it is. Kyler and Brayden are on different teams and that does make it for a busy season, but so far, so good. This week they each had their first game.

Here we go with Kyler in the outfield. Just twiddling his thumbs really... (he's furthest back)

Yawning... Okay, no seriously he really does seem to like it, but he is getting used to it... Up to bat!

Right before swinging...he hits the ball and runs to first!

Now we have Brayden in outfield! (head down in the middle)

Mom, what are you doing?

Swing batter batter swing!

So cute!

And while waiting to bat...what better to do than climb the fence!

So we are going to learn a good balance of homework, home life, family time AND baseball because so far it just seems crazy! But we are loving it, the boys are loving it and I think it will be great! So exciting for all the fun changes going on with my boys...but this does mean they are growing up...which is hard.

Buttons!

2011-04-12T14:02:00.000-07:00

Notice anything new ========================> I finally got a button...I must admit that although I am pretty good at figuring out computer stuff, I had issues getting my button to work for a while. but no more! So GRAB IT! Post it, share it, and all that good stuff! XOXOXO

Hats...and the flu

2011-04-12T12:29:00.001-07:00

So it has been a rough couple of weeks, yes? Cortney is recovering well from his surgery, but the first two weeks were the pits! My Grandma's passing and going to Arizona, that's obviously hard to go through...and well then yesterday I got the FLU! I can't even tell you the last time I had the flu so bad. I typically don't run a fever when I get sick, even if I feel like I have one, I usually don't. Well, yesterday I had a fever of 102.6 so I knew I was really sick! Anyhoo, I am MUCHO better today. THANK HEAVENS. And can I just say that Brayden and Keaton were saints yesterday and I was able to stay in bed all day! And my hubby helped so much as well, so I am sure that's one of the reasons I am better so quickly.

Which brings me to my next topic, HATS! I have discovered that I pretty much love a good, cute, fashionable hat.

Can you tell in this picture that I haven't washed my hair in three days?! Thats why I love me a good hat! For days like today when I don't have the energy to shower but know I will be going somewhere later where I will see someone and want to look somewhat decent. AND it hides the baggy shadows under my eyes! ;)

I know, not the most exciting post in the world. But it needed to be said, right?! Heres to no more flu!

Pretty, Pretty PLEASE?!

2011-04-08T15:54:00.000-07:00

Hey friends and family! Would you all do me a huge favor and "follow me" on my business website? Pretty, pretty please? I know most of you follow my business on facebook (thank you for that!) and I am currently in the process of creating a button, so it would be easier to follow me. But in the meantime, I am trying to build up my followers so I can host my very own giveaway for one of YOU.

So check it out...and follow me! THANKS. LOVE YOU ALL!!!

www.lizzyluu.blogspot.com

Elizabeth

~Colleen Lois Mills~

2011-04-05T15:29:00.000-07:00

A week ago this past Friday, my sweet Grandmother, my Mother's Mother, passed away at the age of 81. It was not a total shock- she had been on and off of hospice for about 7 months. But it all just happened so fast. I will spare the details as I really don't even think I can go there right now...but I will just say this. Yes, it's all true. When someone you love dies, you go through all the stages. Shock, sadness, anger, more sadness, etc. You feel guilty you did not spend more time with them, you go through all the memories in your head over and over just wish that you could have them happen again for real. I had NO CLUE how sad I would feel from this loss. Especially since we have been preparing for it as a family for a long time. We knew it would happen.

This pic I wasn't in...but it was taken in front of my Grandma's old house in Prescott. 99.9% of my memories are from this house and I miss it so dearly!

Nicknamed "Big Red" for her beautiful striking Red hair that she wore into behives in her younger days, she had a vibrant personality that I like to think I take after a little. She truly worked her way to the top all on her own and always took care of anyone and everyone. My mother is that way. I will tell you that I can handle her loss okay... it was going through my Grandmother's things that tore me to pieces. Bringing up so many memories, making me wonder certain things, just going through it all without her there was so hard and I truly do not know how my mother, Aunt and Uncle have been able to do it. I have a new appreciation for the strength my mom has shown through everything over the past several years she has taken care of my Grandma. I am so blessed to be able to have a few nice treasures of my Grandmothers to keep in the family and keep her legacy strong.

This picture was taken exactly a week before she went into a coma like state. She wasn't feeling well and the start of her true illness was showing already, but we are ALL so grateful she was able to hold her first great-grandchild from her last grandchild! (Does that make sense?)...My little sis is the youngest of all the grandchildren and had her first baby...and we almost wondered if she stuck around so long during her final weeks so she could meet him in this lifetime...

Don't worry, I am not in a deep dark depression like I may sound in this post. I am so happy my Grandmother is in a better place and that she is with my Grandmpa and her son who passed away at 18 months old. I am SO GRATEFUL for the plan on salvation and for the chance I have to see my Granmother again someday. She has left an amazing legacy behind. I am happy to be part of it. I am especially happy that I could spend some quality time with her before she passed.

All the emotions of this has really made me want to be a better wife, mother and friend to all. I want to leave behind a wonderful legacy as well. It really does make you focus on what you are doing with your life! I can't take for granted FAMILY and how important they are to me.

So here's to YOU Grandma! I love you so much!!

Colleen Lois Mills

March 16th, 1930-March 25th, 2011

UPDATE

2011-03-21T14:27:00.001-07:00

I can't even begin to express how much love Cort and I feel from everyone! THANK YOU to everyone for the kind words, thoughts, prayers and acts of service in our behalf! We have three different people taking turns watching our kids kids today- one of those had to end up wathcing them an hour earlier than expected this morning, one of them switched times with another to make things work better and the third one is doing it last minute (with a half days notice) because another one got sick! How is that for helpful neighbors! All have been loving and willing to help with not a complaint. We have had offers for meals amongst other things and truly feel so lucky to be living in an area where we can get so much help, especially since we have little family around. My in-laws just left on a service mission assignment so it is hard asking others for help. It is truly a time when I miss living near my family, but seriously, it does not get better than this with neighbors!

So seriously, thank you from the bottom of our hearts! THANK YOU!

Now, Cort's surgery went well. Right now we are sitting in a recovery room. They are waiting for him to fully wake up where he can sit up. I told him on the way here that while he is "out of it" I am going to make him promise me all kinds of things...texting on my phone, some new clothes, etc. HA HA! Anyways the surgeon came in and met with me after the surgery and told me that everything went perfectly, exactly how he expected it to. The recovery is 5 days after we go home- so Cort has the whole week off. He is very pale and obviously very tired, but otherwise looks fine. His ear is completely covered in what looks like a shoulder pad, so I have no idea how much swelling there is yet. The swelling will take a full 5-6 weeks to go completely down and it will also take that long for us to know how sucessful this surgery was. Because there is swelling around the tube we just put in, it pushes on the tube, somewhat closing it a little with the pressure. So once the swelling is down, the tube will have nothing pushing against it and can therefore be 100% effective. So we shall see how things go.

I will update more as soon as I know something else, but for now, we are just waiting it out. Thank you again for all the love, support and prayers! We feel truly blessed!

Now for your visual entertainment...I needed a good smile right about now, so here are some cute pics of Keaton enjoying some chocolate fondue...

It turned out to be a bath night that night! :)

The BIG DAY is almost here...

2011-03-20T19:13:00.000-07:00

Cortney goes in for surgery around 10am tomorrow (monday) morning, so please keep him and our family in your thoughts and prayers throughout the day and I will let you know how things go as soon as I can. Thank you already for all the thoughts and prayers thus far and thanks for the upcoming ones! We love you all! Wish us luck tomorrow that this really works!!

Kyler is almost 7!!

2011-03-19T18:28:00.000-07:00

At 6:42 (ish) in the morning tomorrow, March 20th, Kyler will be 7 years old! I cannot even believe it! 7 years ago I became a mom for the first time and I know I fit the typical stereotypical comment when I say "it goes by so fast" cause it DOES!

So we knew throwing Kyler's birthday party today was best since next weekend Cort will be recovering from surgery and we just don't know how he will feel. Naturally Kyler wanted an ALIEN party. Naturtally. So an Alien party he got!

And here he is, almost 7 years old. WOW!

This is typical.
I must say, my space ship invitations turned out UBER-COOL! You can't read the font here, but it says "We're going out of this world for Kyler's 7th Birthday Party" and other really cool spacey/alieny things. :)

I have made a tissue paper pom-pom decorative thingy once before just to see how hard it would be, but I didn't actually put it together or do anything with it. So this week I had a friend come over and offically show me how to make them so I could have super cool space/hanging decorations. Totally not necessary, and to be honest, Kyler didnt really care that much. "cool mom" was about it- BUT I LOVED THEM! Ha! And for the record, they were SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO easy. And cheap. And easy.

A different angle.

Cool looking alien cake right?! I know! ha ha. It was fun.

Close up on the eyes. Don't they scare you?

Okay, now THIS was the best part of the whole party. The game my mom either invented or learned from someone else. But when she came in October, she did this with the kids and it seemed fitting for todays theme. You put gummy worms on a plate and cover it with whipped cream (from the spray can) and the kids have to eat it, dig through it with their face! Talk about cool boy stuff! So I told the kids it was alien guts and all of them loved it and did it. There was one super cute little girl who put her hands in and that was it, otherwise, everyone dug in!

Seriously fun times.

Opening presents. I love how all of them get so involved!

All the kids (and must I mention that two of Kyler's bestest friends got strep and couldn't make it, so we were missing them!)

Finally, singing Happy Birthday and blowing out the candles.

It was a super fun party but I am SO GLAD it's OVER! WHEW! More than anything I am so glad to have Kyler in my life. He is such a sweet spirit and I am so grateful for him. I will have to post a little more on him later cause now that the party is over I am headed to a girls night out. It's been a long week and next week will be even longer, so I am gearing up tonight! Happy Birthday to my sweet Kyler!

Another Review and Giveaway!!

2011-03-18T16:52:00.000-07:00

I can't believe I was ever nervous or hesitant to do a review/giveaway...cause I LOVE THEM!!

Check out the newest review and giveaway on my wipey cases!!

http://takeitfrom-me.blogspot.com/2011/03/lizzyluu-designs-review-giveaway.html

The Surgery

2011-03-14T13:41:00.000-07:00

So, I know I have posted bits and pieces before about my husbands disease, but here is some detailed info...

Ménière's disease is characterized by the following symptoms:

•a rise in the level of endolymphatic fluid in the labyrinth of the inner ear
•hearing loss that comes and goes
•a sensation that the environment or oneself is revolving or spinning (vertigo)
•ringing, buzzing, or hissing noises in the ears (tinnitus)
•a feeling that the ears are blocked or plugged

--This description doesn't show vomitting, so let me just add that one in myself...

About 2 years ago, Cort was on an airplane when his ear clogged. Several days later, it still hadn't unclogged and he suddenly had a massive vertigo attack. The room was spinning, he could not stop throwing up and was sick for several days. And when I say he was sick...I mean can't even walk or get up from the very spot he has collapsed in--it is so bad. He went to several different specialist because he could tell it wasn't your usual bout of vertigo/sickness- something was going on. He was diagnosed with Menieres disease and put on a different range of medicine's that don't help much. He was told that if you can just get through the first year, the symptoms will mellow out and you won't be sick as often. Well, that has not been the case for Cortney. He goes a month at a time being sick. Usually his symptoms last for at least a week to a month and the last time he was sick, he lost 9 pounds in one day!! (I don't lose even close to that when I get the flu...I could only dream that going through something so horrible would help me on my diet!! ;)) It really isn't funny and there is no upside to this. It is terrible for him. It's not just the throwing up...its the constant ringing in the ears, hearing loss, hearing going in and out, throwing up and all the above COMBINED and AT THE SAME TIME!

It has been hard on the whole family, but especially Cortney. First we learned about a surgery that would sever the nerve in his ear. Yes, he would be deaf on that one side, however, it would eliminate the disease and he would be cured! He truly was considering it when he learned of a different surgery...

Endolymphatic shunt surgery is one of the surgical procedures available to treat Ménière's disease, which is also known as endolymphatic hydrops. The surgery is based on the theory that the disorder causes the inner ear to become overloaded with fluid and that draining this fluid will relieve the symptoms. The fluid is drained by opening the endolymphatic sac, a pouch located next to the mastoid bone at the end of the endolymphatic duct. The endolymphatic duct is a canal that leads to the inner ear. Then a very small silicone tube is placed in the membranous labyrinth of the inner ear to drain excess fluid.

After all the numbers come back, it is estimated that there is an overall 60% chance of curing the vertigo. We'll take it!! Especially because there is NO RISK involved with this surgery. The only risk is there is a 0.5% chance that there could be some hearing loss...which Cortney already has.

So the surgery is scheduled for Monday the 21st (a week from today). We are so prayerful and hopeful that this will at least significantly reduce the attacks, if not eliminate them completely. We are so grateful for all the thoughts and prayers that have been with us during these past two years that Cort has struggled with this. And all we can ask now is that you keep the prayers coming...at least on Monday!!

We'll keep you posted!

All about Kyler...mostly.

2011-03-12T20:16:00.000-08:00

It has been a busy past two weeks. We have been keeping busy with all the normal things of life, combined with some fun projects and changes.

To start...Playdough! HA. Well, just normal fun things to do around the house, but the kids got really creative this particular day, so out came the camera!!

By the way, Brayden said this was ME! Nice!

Next up: ME=Creative Genius! I have to admit, when Kyler came home from school telling me he was doing a project on snakes and needed to dress up like a snake...I'm like...WHAT?! How in the world do you dress up like a snake? The teacher said it could even be something as simple as sweats in the color of the animal...but I couldn't go THAT plain...sooooo after doing a little internet searching, which I happen to love to do...I came up with an idea...or rather took bits and pieces of ideas I read. ENTER Kyler with a super cool snake wrapped around him...making scary faces of course!

Come on now, isn't that the coolest super real looking snake you have ever seen made for FREE? Well, at least HE thought it was cool ;) So, now we have pictures of him IN a snake cage at school...

With the other like animals.

In the performance after the "project."

His personal part of a song about a pig...he was cute! And SO BIG!

As if that wasn't enough in the Kyler category, he had yet another performance at school for ART. Keaton LOVED it! Every kid that walked on stage, Keaton yelled "Hi Kyler."

We couldn't get many pictures because the choir director was right in our view, but we managed to get a few cute ones.

And there you have Kyler, Episode 1...cause Episode 2 will come next week after his 7th Birthday. Yes, 7th!! I cannot even believe it.

So what else has been going on? Well Kyler and Keaton basically switched rooms. We didn't move anything but their beds to see if Kyler truly does want his own room and if Brayden and Keaton can manage well together. The first two nights and morning afters were difficult with Keaton and Brayden. They didn't want to go to bed and then would wake up super early...but I think we might actually be mellowing out into a normal schedule again. Maybe...so a few more days of trying this out and we will decide if this is for real and can move dressers, etc.

I've also been busy making more wipey cases, organizing some things around the house, getting plans organized for Kyler's Birthday...AND preparing for Cortney's upcoming surgery. WHICH I have decided deserves a post of it's own. So more on that in a day or two.

Needless to say, we have been BUSY! More later.

Giveaways, Finally

2011-03-11T11:51:00.001-08:00

So I have finally hopped onto the bandwagon of "giveaways." I have never done one before today but have finally given into it-- So today is my first of several reviews/giveaways with my wipey cases.

Check it out and enter to win one for yourself or to give away to someone else!

http://corner--house.blogspot.com/

Hope YOU win!

Check. IT. out.

2011-03-07T15:44:00.000-08:00

So I updated my baby business blog with some of my new cases...and let's just say THIS one is getting rave reviews~

It is so super cute, yes I know. Can you believe I made one even CUTER than this that I sold right away and the fabric was this little strip that I don't have any more of and can't find anywhere online?! Oh the drama! (You lucky dog Kristina!)...Anyways, go see some of my new wipey cases for yourself, order one if you like...just remember you can change any of them around any way you like from changing the bow, changing the color of the ribbon or something else- I also do custom designs- you tell me what you want and I will make it happen! Have fun snooping around :)

lizzyluu.blogspot.com

Zumba, the color Red and Good Food!

2011-03-03T14:20:00.000-08:00

Ever since I discovered Zumba, I have slowly gone to more and more classes...it is WONDERFUL! However, I have found myself not getting ready as many days. I have always (at least since I can remember) taken the time to shower, get myself prettied up NO MATTER what- my house can go a little bit dirty, etc. because I have always felt that doing that little something for myself, like taking the time to get myself ready, helps me to feel better about myself, among other things. So, typically I go to aerobics Mon, Wed and Fri, and Tuesdays and Thursdays I do something else, one of the those days usually Zumba. Lately I have been doing some Zumba classes on the days I also do my regular aerobics. This makes for me getting sweaty and gross, then taking the time to get prettied up, then getting sweaty and gross later. It takes too much time! So instead I have been putting on a cute hat, body spraying myself, combined with some lotion and deoderant and changing my clothes and calling it good. I HATE it! I am not going to lie, but then really it doesn't make sense to do things any other way since I am going to work out again later.

Anyways, why am I rambling on and on about this? Because the other day Cort was out of town so I couldn't go to Zumba. It was fine, no biggie. But I got myself absolutely prettied up to the best of my abilities- I wore my favorite color, of course, which is RED and then I decided I better take a picture of myself to capture the moment of me looking like a normal human being. Especially since on this day I have nowhere to go, so it was the day of all days I could have stayed absolutely gross! ;)

The funny thing is I just couldn't keep a straight face for nothing- cause who just randomly takes a picture of themselves to post on their blog with no other explanation than they got ready for the day????

So there you go. And there I go...and speaking of Cortney being out of town...50% of the time when he goes out of town, we have pancakes for dinner. It's pancakes, cereal, something easy peasy. The other 50% of the time, I make something fabulous that my husband doesn't like and won't eat (he is picky). While he was gone for these few days, I made fabulous meals every single night!! And while dinner was cooking on this same day that I happened to look as fabulous as I could, I decided it too deserved a picture taken since it is so incredibly YUMMY.

It's my mom's Hamburger Hawaiian. Served over steamed rice. MMMMMMMMMMMM. What a great day it was indeed. And to make life even better, the weather was great too! It has been a pretty great week! Hope the same for you. ;)

TORN

2011-02-25T21:52:00.000-08:00

I am completely torn on an issue and AM asking for comments, opinions on the matter please! So, Kyler has been talking to me for the last two weeks about having his own room.

Here's the backstory. Kyler had his own room until about 4 months before Keaton was born. (so about 3 years ago, roughly) I felt really strongly that Kyler and Brayden needed to share a room. It was very hard to say the least. Kyler and Brayden have completely different sleeping habits...and now they can play and mess around and talk instead of going to sleep. So it took some getting used to and although they have a good routine now, it is STILL hard sometimes. Now, on the flip side of this- I DO think it has brought them closer together. I DO believe it eliminated a jealousy factor that would have occured had one of them shared a room with Keaton- the other would have felt left out. I do think there have been many positives with this.

The funny thing is, Kyler sometimes gets scared and sleeps with Brayden. So Cortney and I talked about it last night and he said we should do a week trial run. One of them sleeps in the guest bedroom and tries it out. I AGREE with this, however, it won't be the same as if they have a new complete room of their own and their own bed to sleep in...right??? I think that does make a difference.

So, we DO have an extra room in our house that currently serves as a guest room and my wipey case office. We have an unfinished basement that everything can be moved into-- and well thats all fine and good for my wipey case stuff, I really do wonder how we will handle company. Should I just make Kyler bunk with Brayden for a night? The kids wouldn't care about this, but this means company sleeping in a twin bed rather than a queen. And thats another thing, part of me thinks the boys will end up having campouts in each others rooms and all anyways, so am I really making this into a bigger deal than it really is?

Part of me really thinks that this would help Kyler with his confidence, which is something he struggles with. I feel like it might even help him focus more on his school work because I plan to set up a little desk/study area for him and I think he would feel completely special with it. On the flip side, will Brayden suffer from this? Should I move Keaton in with Brayden since they have similar sleeping habits of just leave them all their own rooms (for now). I don't want all my kids to have their own rooms all the time- I just don't. I think they develop great qualities by sharing and taking turns getting their own rooms, so I am struggling with this issue!! I don't want to make it more than I need to, which is exactly what I am doing.

Part of me reallllly thinks this is a good idea, I am just struggling with all the "what-ifs" and all. AND I don't want to take away my guest room for when my family comes to visit. We really truly love having them and I feel like it makes life a lot easier for them to have their own room/space when they come.

So, I ultimately will decide with Cort what is best. BUT I would appreciate any insight any of you have that might open my eyes a little more clearly on the subject at hand. Please. I need help!! ;)

Growing Up Too Fast

2011-02-19T20:16:00.000-08:00

Okay, you need to meet Harrison. He is my sweet new nephew, a week old tomorrow (Sunday). My little sis had her first baby 5 1/2 weeks early (not related to why I have my babies early) and this little guy has had to spend time in the NICU until he can eat better.

He's had a little jaundice and a few little hiccups that are normally for early babies, but does he LOOK little to you? This little chunky munky was 6 pounds 4 ounces my friends. He has ROLLS already. So it's hard because they don't want to treat him like a preemie, but he acts like one and needs the care of one- but seriously, ROLLS! I LOVE baby ROLLS!! ;)) I can't wait to meet him in person. I love him already. My little sis has had a bumpy road but she is close to bringing him home and can't wait to get life really truly started as a family of 3. I am so excited for her...did I mention he has ROLLS? And did you see that double chin? I just can't even get over it. I am a baby person, if you can't tell...

So speaking of babies...what happened to mine? My 22 pound Peanut Keaton is growing up WAAAAAAY faster than my other two. And it's NOT FAIR!! I want him to stay young. Not just little, but young. So a few weeks ago he decided he was completely done with his booster seat. Oh yeah, forget about it. No more sitting up to the table with a little bit of height to him, he is sitting on his knees and aint nothing I can do about it. I can't even belive it. And I am sure if I let him, he would be out of his carseat too! That is just not happening, obviously. I just can't believe the attitude he gives me over such things. Sheesh!

So how can he change from this??? (notice the binky covers half his face, he was about 3 pounds here)

TO THIS: Seriously! He is SOOOO LIITLE! And yet he does so much that is beyond his age that I often get strange looks from people...
He just does things and says things that a normal 2 1/2 - 3 year old would, but he looks like he is about a year old, so it's crazy! I just can't take it. So this last week he has started climbing out of his crib. Can I tell you that first of all, to get his little legs all the way over the crib is quite impressive because he practically does the middle splits to do it. But he does it. Cort has felt for some time that Keaton was ready for the toddler bed. But I have not been even close to ready. Putting him into the toddler bed comes with a whole new mess of issues. Now we have to leave his door open at night, which means he will get out of bed 100 times and he will get up super early to discover he has the freedom to get out of bed, so he will. I am not ready to deal with that. However, with that being said, I finally caved tonight because I had no choice. The little guy is getting out of the crib either way and banging on the door. And the toddler bed was already in his room and he has played in it before. So I had a talk with him, showed him the bed and he lit up. He was so excited to be a big boy like his brothers. That is all he wants to do. He wants to do everything like his brothers.

So as I am putting him in the new bed tonight, he says "Daddy night night?" I said Yes. He says "kyler night night, Brayden night night?" I said "Yes. And now Keaton night night." And he says "ok mom." Of course it wasn't that easy. He still fought me and got out of bed 100 times. I ended up closing the door and letting him cry for a while, then I opened it and told him that I would leave it open if he stayed in bed and it worked! I cannot even believe how mature he is. He gets so much more than I even know. I just can't belive he is growing up so fast.

SIGH. All three boys, no more babies. Sniff Sniff. I am not ready for this.

Valentine's Day 2011

2011-02-17T21:33:00.000-08:00

Every year a company that Cort's work contracts with (or something like that) invites us to an Annual Snowmobiling trip at Daniel's Summit. It's one night and we get there around dinner time, have dinner, have activities and games and prizes that night. The next day we get up early, eat breakfast and head on out for 3 hours of snowmobiling! We have only been able to go once, but last time we went is very strong in my memory because while we were there I started suspecting I was pregnant (9 months later = Keaton)... Don't get any ideas folks...not this time around! It's just a good memory! ;) But Cort's parents watched our kids so we could go and it was so nice!

The beautiful snow, trees and nature.

More scenery while we are driving around.

Cortney

So we did this the weekend before Valentine's Day, so we counted it as our Valentine's Night and it was great!

On Monday we made it all about Valentine's with the kids. We set the table all fun for them with their valentines out and some candy and dessert after dinner, etc. They also got plenty of Valentine's at school and so it was a really fun day for them.

Good times. Can't wait for this trip next year! :)

Project 1 DOWN!

2011-02-12T22:14:00.000-08:00

So I decided for my first big project, it would have to be something that would benefit me almost immedietly. Some of my other projects, like organizing things in the basement, will be great except that I hardly ever go to the basement (it's unfinished and just storage). So I will save that for another time and I started with my wipey case office...and with that the whole guest bedroom had to be organized with it. The bedroom itself was pretty clean and organized, but the closet, where my wipey case office is...well, that was not.

Okay, so here is taking out ALL the fabric that was in there to sort it.

The corner of the closet and floor...or lack thereof! Before:
Now, my desk isn't NORMALLY this messy, but I had just been working on some major projects sooooo...Also, pay attention to under my desk as well...my desk before:

This little random misc. bookcase we got for free and really don't have a good purpose for it. So before:

This is the bed DURING my organization...so this is not what it normally looks like, this is all stuff from my closet/office:

Here are some of my fabrics organized afterwards:

This is a corner afterwards: Isn't it amazing!

The top of the closet now (although I guess I didn't show a before of this) AFTER:

My desk AFTER:

I still need to figure a better way to organize my ribbon where I can grab a spool at random, see all the different ribbons I have all at once and have it look nice.

But overall, it only took me a day working on it...not a full day, but a day working on it while also taking care of the kids, getting them meals, changing diapers and all that stuff. So I had a lot of breaks, but it really wasn't that bad. And now it is so much better! 1 project down, about 10 more projects to go!

Just normal life

2011-02-10T10:04:00.000-08:00

Do I dare say this has been a mild winter as far as colds go in our house. Last year, during this exact week, Keaton got RSV and was sent to the hospital. This year he has had two colds, but neither have been very bad.

But just take a look at this sweet little face...I mean, seriously?

Poor wittle guy. He is totally fine now...I took these last week when he had a bad cold. He was just so blah. But, like I said, he is well now and I am so happy if this is the worst this cold season has and will bring us!
So what have I been up to? Besides taking care of sick kids last week, I took on one major project off my to-do list/goals for this year and will post pictures in another post. I have been Zumba-ing my little heart out. I LOVE ZUMBA!! it is so much fun and this is one of my fav. Zumba instructors Irma.

Now speaking of "workout out"...I took one look at Keaton's legs the other day and thought to myself...He did NOT get those legs from me...bird legs!

It's just a shame that I can't look that lean in high heels! He is going through a shoe stage...anyones shoes, anytime.

There is so much more to post, but I don't have any time! Cause you know I was called to be the Young Women's Girl's camp DIRECTOR?! Not leader, not helper, DIRECTOR! Me! Seriously! Soooooooo, life is going to get busy from now until like forever. I am way excited and freaked all at the same time. Will post more soon, promise!

All things 31

2011-02-02T11:23:00.001-08:00

Being a mom is a wonderful thing. But once you are a mom, your job is 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. When your sick, you still have to work. And so when you have a birthday- even though you can do things to make it extra special- you still have to do all the normal things of your life. Make breakfast for the kids, get them off to school, etc. Most birthdays since I have had kids have come and gone with little excitement, HOWEVER, this year was great!

Now, the first disclaimer I want to make is no birthday is ever the same since I moved away from Arizona because my dear mother and I share the same special b-day (along with a niece of mine as well) and we used to celebrate every b-day together. Last year I was lucky enough to spend my b-day in AZ with my mom, but it just didn't work out for this year. So I must say that no matter how wonderful my birthday's are, it will never be the same when my mom and I are apart, and that is just the way it is! LOVE YOU MOM!

Secondly, I am blessed to have the best friends and family ever to pamper me and make me feel more special on my birthday than I can remember feeling on a birthday before! My birthday started the weekend BEFORE my big day. Some of my friends arranged for a fun little bowling party with our families...

It was a blast except for this little stinker who we really had to be careful with. He seemed to think he could lift a bowling ball. We helped him bowl a few times, but he really didn't seem to get that the bowling balls were heavier than he is! ;)

Kyler and Brayden loved it! Cortney and I helped them a bit but they got it on their own too.
There goes Brayden's ball, I think it was a strike!

Just a few of my lovely lady friends...

It was a great night and we had so much fun! On Sunday, the day before my birthday, Cort and the kids made me a German Chocolate Cake! And I had no idea cause I was sleeping on the couch while they made it. It was delicious!

Then Monday, WOOOWWW! So all before leaving the house to get the kids off to school I had 3 phone calls of Birthday Wishes. During the drive, a few more calls. Aerobics was one of the hardest workouts of my life-which was exactly what I wanted and needed- and lots of birthday wishes from friends there. On to get Brayden from preschool and I get two phone calls with wonderings of where I am...I apparently had two deliveries to my door--one, a plate of goodies from a sweet neighbor, the next flowers from my sweet friend Sandra. Throughout the day I got a package from my mom and Sister, over 80 messages of Birthday wishes on Facebook and several more sweet doorbell ringings with goodies/lotions, etc. It was amazing!!

We ended the night with my favorite- A steak dinner with baked potato and cooked veggies (I dont have steak or potatos very often but they are my FAVORITE). Then lots of cake and desserts...a wonderful FHE given by Kyler followed by birthday spankings from all of my kids.

Finally, my friends had me over for desserts, goodies of all kinds, diet coke galore, presents and just plain old gossip and girl talk! It was so great! I can't remember the last time so many different people went out of their way to make me feel so special. It really was a very special day.

So I took this picture to show, 1, the flowers my friend sent me (and yes, I put them in my bathroom because I just wanted to, okay!) and 2, to show that Cort got me a hand mirror for my bathroom (next to the flowers on the right). YAY! He always remembers that one little thing I mentioned I wanted like a year ago and never got...then he surprises me the exact one I would have picked out! It was great!

All in all, minus being apart from my mom on our birthdays, it was the best it could be! Thanks again for my friends and family for all the phone calls, e-mails, notes, cards, presents, parties, everything!! Now back to real life...

New Years Resolutions 2011

2011-01-30T19:11:00.000-08:00

FINALLY! I have not taken the time to sit down and write down my resolutions for this year yet...er...shall I say I have not been motivated to do it cause I know it is my officall "put me to work" list...and once I make the list...I get going!!

So I was thinking about my birthday tomorrow...and I was thinking of how one of my friends posted a "32 things I want to do before I'm 32" list and it was So.Cool. So I kind of incorporated my New Years List with some just plain old things I want to do this year and thought if I made them more of a goal then I would be more likely to do them. So don't mind that some of them arent really resolutions, just hopeful plans!

There are, of course, a few things I am NOT posting because it is just plain old too personal...but here is most of my 2011 New Years Resolutions!

Lose final 8 pounds to have my “body fat” percentage within the range I want (although I am trying for this, I am not going to beat myself up either cause I'm pretty happy with how I look and feel right now)

Run a half marathon (or at least be signed up and training by the end of the year)

Play racquetball with my husband, several times at least...and maybe some tennis too

Make a quilt for me (not one that I give away as a gift to someone else)

Pray more

Read the Book of Mormon

Profound Moments in Life

2011-01-27T20:24:00.000-08:00

Hello there friends. I know I have neglected you so. Cause I know I have a kazillion friends that read my blog right?! HA! I have felt empty as far as what to write about these days...or rather I didn't feel ready to write about anything because inside my head I was bursting at the seams with deep thoughts.

Rather than share all my personal experiences that have happened over the last few weeks, I will simply tell you this. I have a deep, close, personal relationship right now with the Lord. I have a long ways to go, don't get me wrong. But he and I have been talking lately- about a few things. And what I can tell YOU, my dear friends and readers, is that he answered my prayers very strongly on some things I was wondering about. These aren't life changing things- these were simply things that I was insecure about...things I wasn't sure if I should do or not. And what do you know? The Lord answered my prayers and gave me the confidence to make decisions on things--knowing he has my back. Knowing I am doing the right thing, even though it wasn't the answer I wanted. And so I feel good. I love feeling good.

So lets just say my mind has been off in far off places and now it is settled and right where it should be. And so this week I have been getting things accomplished like crazy (I love it when that happens!)

You want to know what I have been doing? Well, I have been working on a few projects that are completed now...and I can't post pictures until my cute sister opens her baby shower presents! And then I will post away... I have been sewing, cleaning, more cleaning, more laundry...

And of course, LAYING around because I have no energy because my thyroid is off and I got a bladder infection. YUCK. And if I told you why I got the infection, you would LAUGH at me because it's not your typical "not drinking enough water" junk...it's actually an embarassing funny story and I won't go there...

But...today things are looking up and I am feeling better AND I went to Zumba today, which is AWESOME and I got a zumba shirt in RED, my fav. color. And I am goin to wear it to class on Saturday...

And so all is well that ends well. And tomorrow is Friday and I teach aerobics. YAYYYY! Happy Weekend, and here's to me actually posting some pictures next week!? ;)

I Know!

2011-01-24T16:22:00.000-08:00

I know, I have totally neglected my blog (at least by my standards!) and I honestly don't have time to write now. I just wanted to share the cutest thing Keaton did last week.

There was one day he had missed his nap and woke up early the next morning, so obviously throughout that next day, he was tired. I was on the computer upstairs and Keaton came in and talked to me for a minute then ran out to play. Typical. But then he didn't come back for a long time- and I am not used to being able to be on the computer. So I was just playing away on fb and doing other things on the computer when I thought it was probably time to put Keaton down for his nap.

Where is Keaton? I couldn't hear him. I looked all through the house...Cortney was downstairs and said he hadn't seen him. Where could he be? He has never done this. So I went in his room and looked in his crib-- which is funny cause I would never have thought to look there, but something just told me too.

And there he was. Sound asleep- two sippy cups in bed next to him, a million blankets and he was snoozing. Normally when he goes down, I close his blinds- they were just wide open and I couldn't belive it. It honestly was the cutest thing in the whole world that he was so tired that he put himself down for a nap. I mean, seriously! So cute!

He is just getting soooo big.

I will write more later. Promise!

Can't Decide

2011-01-16T21:50:00.000-08:00

I don't have time or energy to write a new post write now. And I can't decide on a good title for this one...all I can tell you is this:

I had a very nice week, even with having sick kids. I had a relaxing and enjoyable weekend being lazy AND having a clean house...at the same time! Amazing!

I had about 4 hours of sleep last night, no nap today and am headed off to bed right now...

I need to post my resolutions for this year...and how I did on last years. All I know is all is well tonight and that can wait till another day. Good night!

Brayden is 5, Part 2

2011-01-09T19:31:00.001-08:00

We had a small birthday party with a few of Brayden's friends this week...it was fun and EXHAUSTING! Not all his friends made it, but looking back it was probably a good thing because it was crazy with all those kids.

Now we started the party by dancing...and although this picture is blurry, there is one thing in here that is very clear--and that is Brayden sticking his bum out to dance, in true Brayden style. Forgive the crudeness of the picture (that's a 5 year old boy for you!)

We played some games where I couldn't take pictures, then had cupcakes and ice cream.

Then presents!
Then some pictures of the whole gang.

Funny faces.

And then, as part of our last game we did some steamrolling...so fun and everyone laughed!

All in all, it was a fun party, but I am SO GLAD it's over until Kyler's birthday cause it was a lot of work!

Brayden is 5, Part 1

2011-01-08T21:53:00.000-08:00

My crazy white haired once 2 1/2 pound boy turned 5 last Sunday! We started with traditional birthday spankings!

Secretley he LOVES getting birthday spankings. Every kid does. He got them from everyone in the family. We had a family party on Sunday after church and had presents, cake and ice cream. It was short and sweet!
Brayden told me he wanted an Iron Man party. He has never seen Iron man- just heard about it through friends and seen Iron man toys in the stores. So naturally we had to get him set up with the best iron man toys out there! Starting with his very own iron man costume from Grandma and Papa.

Kyler was happy to assist in opening of presents.

We got him the iron man arm and circular "heart" that the REAL iron man has! Of course, nothing but the best for our Brayden! ;)

All suited up and ready to go!

Okay, I know I am vain about a lot of things. But one of my new years resolutions is that everything doesn't have to perfect all the time! So, if I am going to have to stay up until 3 in the morning just to get a cake perfectly done right, than FORGET IT! Not everything has to be perfect all the time. Case in point: Brayden's birthday cake. Normally, if it's an iron man party, I would spend hours looking up how to make the perfect iron man cake. Then I would spend hours trying to make it. AND it would never turn out how I want it anyways! I am always dissappointed, it's not really my talent. So I decided to make a simple cake with whatever colors Brayden wanted. I asked him what kind of cake he wanted. He told me a red cake with red frosting and blue writing. And here you have it! :

So it was a red velvet cake and it was SOOOOO YUMMY! This picture is when we were singing happy birthday to Brayden. As you can see, Keaton loves Brayden's costume too! And can I just tell you that Brayden was really sweet to share it just after he opened it!

Keaton realllllly loved the cake! This picture is actually AFTER I already had cleaned some of it up!

Some of my favorite things about Brayden are:

He is very clever, and although it usually leads to trouble, I am always impressed at the things he thinks of.

He almost always shares. He is the first one to give up something he loves for one of his Brothers if he can tell they want it more than he does.

He dances so silly all the time (90% of the time it involves him shaking his bum around)

He always compliments me!

He is always considerate of other's feelings and does a really good job at playing with his younger brother and helping me with him.

I just love my Brayden and cannot even believe he is 5!

Bummed

2011-01-04T19:38:00.000-08:00

I am whinning today (that is- as in, whine- ing, OR wine-ing). I had a pretty decent day, but around 4:00 I got really bummed. Our Durango went back on the tow truck first thing Monday morning. My in-laws lent me their car again, which I am SOOOOO grateful for. The car fix and problem was the same problem we have been having, BUT the mechanic we have has not been very thorough- hence the car going back agian and again because he has missed things. BIG things or little things, depending on how you look at it- but I consider them BIG because my car can't RUN at all (hence needing to be towed) without these things fixed. So the call I got around 4:00pm today was that the tow truck hook had punctured a hole somewhere important and now we are waiting for them to come and fix it. WHAT the WHAT?! I am SO done with repairs! I am done with not having my car- and because I have my in-laws car, I have to have different people watch 2 of my kids so I can do the carpool that I have to do this week. I can't fit everyone in the car. And the heater is broken. Can I whine some more to you?

Honestly, I am a glass half full kind of person. But two weeks before Christmas having the car die twice, having this whole thing happen twice was VERY stressful. And so as things have settled down this new Year and I am happy and calm and not stressed and then this happens AGAIN and I feel my heartrate go up and I am like a freakazoid all over again because I am running like a chicken with my head cut off in the mornings getting my kids to two different places although not at the same time because they can't fit in the car! Cause my car is gone! BOOOOO HOOOOOOOO. Whine whine.

Okay I am done now. I am ready now to move on. I DID have a wonderful New Years! We had some friends over and played games and the kids were great and the mess was minimal! It was fun. And I am mostly back on track with eating better again (cause I must admit I did NOT eat well when I was in AZ). And we are all currently healthy and who can really ask for more than that these days? So coming soon- Brayden's Birthday Pics- cause he is 5 and so cute! Thanks for listening my friends.

Fabulous!

2010-12-31T16:38:00.000-08:00

It has been a great week! I finished a book I was reading, got the house clean AND had lots of fun playing with my kids...pictures will come later. Today was such a great day starting with my kids sleeping in until 8! 8:00 people! Thats REALLLLLLLY late for my kids to sleep in and I am loving it! Then I did an awesome workout and the day has just been great. Now we are getting things ready for some friends to come over and play games tonight for The New Year! We are excited and I thinking about all the resolutions I am wanting to make for this coming year...and I must say, I am extra excited because I realized most of the things I wanted to accomplish in 2010 happened!

Hope everyone has a safe and Happy New Year and may all the Resolutions on Blogs start pouring in so I can get in some good reading!!!

---Elizabeth

All Things Christmas!

2010-12-28T19:43:00.001-08:00

These past two weeks have been so busy, fun, exciting, wonderful and stressful to say the least! I don't know what happened to me this holiday season, but I turned into a major stress freak. I mean, seriously phsycho- like, seriously. Every other year we go to AZ for Christmas, so that means usually planning to get everything done for Christmas a week early. I have done this for many years. So why was I a freakazoid this year? I dont know. I did my Christmas baking, my house cleaning, my usual Christmas calendar for my mom, all things usual...and yet, somehow I had mini breakdowns every other day or so. And once I got to AZ, all Christmas shopping done and all stressful issues gone, I was still a freakazoid. But somehow, with Christmas Eve came a peace and the stress melted away and the true spirit of Christmas shone through. And it was wonderful!

But first things first, before we left, Brayden had his preschool Christmas performance!

Doesn't he look thrilled??
Singing, sitting well.

Finally decided to pull his tie out from under his sweater.

Then Santa came! Of course, the kids were thrilled and it was wonderful!

Did I mention I was stressed a little??

I took the above picture of myself one night for myself at first. I though, I need to remember how crazy I look right now. I was truly crazy. Now I laugh at it. Seriously- why was I so stressed and forgetting what really mattered this holiday season??! Oh if I could only change how crazy I was...

Tuesday night we celebrated Christmas with my Dad. He and his wife and her son came to Phoenix and we had dinner and dessert and it was great!

These two pictures are priceless. One if further away so you can see what was going on, and the close up is soooo sweet. My Grandma was restless to get out of the house...she is in poor health so it is hard to take her out and she usually doesn't feel up to it. But she felt like she needed to see some of the hussle and bussle of Christmas. We took he out and Kyler grabbed her hand as we were walking...SO SWEET!

And finally, Christmas morning! Stockings first!

Still tired, but loving every minute!

Wow, lots of neat stuff!

The boys admiring their new toys.

Keaton was the first to dig into his candy. I think he cared more about the candy than anything.

My neice- one of the twins- this picture, it just HAD to be taken!

My handome brothers! Seriously. It was so fun being all together on Christmas Day.

All of us siblings together.

Just ignore the fact that my arm looks so incredibly FAT in this picture.

My beautiful sisters and I!

All in all, a wonderful Holiday in the beautiful Arizona. Next year I am determined to be more relaxed and try hard to focus on what is really important. Like my family, who I love! And of course, the birth of our Savior!

Hope eveyone else had a wonderful holiday as well....now onto New Years! Let the New Resolutions Begin!

Christmas Happenings

2010-12-13T21:49:00.001-08:00

Lot's of fun things have been happening around our house this Christmas Season. Lot's of crazy things too, but let's focus on the fun today right? So, Friday night was our ward Christmas Party. The kids got to sit on Santa's lap and loved it!

Brayden told Santa he wanted a jumping castle. Uh, sorry bud, dont get your hopes up!

Kyler told Santa he wanted a chain-saw with special protective glasses. How did he even know about a chain saw? Seriously?? What the what dude?
Santa noticed Kyler had a lot of silly bands. It is always funny when people comment on his silly bands. But it only encouranges him. *SIGH* He is getting better...espeically after they were taken away last month for a LOOOOOONG time. Anyways.

Keaton was cute. He just sat there and talked with his thumb in his mouth. Santa kept taking it out to help me try and get a picture of him. It was really cute.

This is the best we could do. So cute, but the thumb right there ready to go. Don't you just love his cute rainboots?

Tonight we went to Temple Square to look at the temple lights. It was so fun. Right as we were parking, we ran into some of our neighbors literally parking right in front of us, so we walked around with them for a little bit and the kids had a great time.

I was actually trying to get a profile pic of Keaton looking out at the water, but the second he saw the camera, he turned and said "cheese" to me...So cute that boy!

My kids and my neighbors kids playing around. She has three boys the same ages as mine! We found out our 3rd boys were "boys" the same week in our pregnancies cause we were due the same week and we both cried together! ;)

Silly faces.

Family pic. It was a very nice night I must say. The weather was perfect- not too cold and the kids had a great time.

But most importantly, we talked about the true meaning of Christmas with our kids. We had a great time!

Finally!

2010-12-10T17:30:00.001-08:00

First, a couple items of business. I am not asking for much people, but HELLLLLOO-O...comments? Like, once in a blue moon please? Leave comments! I always hear about people reading my blog, and I rarely leave comments for others, but come on, like 5 posts in a row with like one comment from the same person?? (Thanks Becky!) Come on peeps! Show me the love ;)

Secondly, after the last two weeks of pure stress and trauma, on to something positive!

Drumroll Please.....

The Summer-long project of building a pergola in our backyard is 99.9% DONE! Wootwoot!

Now, I *could* write a complete sob story about my husband taking on this project and me not being prepared for him to be spending every waking second that he's not watching a football game working on...but really- I think neither of us realized that this project was going to do for us.
And my husband has heard waaaay too much nagging and complaining from me...but I DID help...A LOT (while kids were climbing up the ladders and I am holding a beam that if I drop will cause serious damage to work done)...so in my defense, I had some good reasons to be grouchy. ;)

It was a lot of work. I DO NOT recommed anyone taking on a project like this EVER unless you have guaranteed that like 4 other guys will help you. I am not even joking. I am dead serious. It is a BIG project and a LOT of work.

So what is the .1% work left we have to do? We are going to build flower boxes to go around the bottom of each beam (thats a project we will take on next summer)- having the boxes will add a lot of class to the structure, and also hide the exposed metal at the bottom of each beam. It will be nice. And next summer we plan on getting a table and chairs so we can sit and enjoy the shade this will provide. And I have visions of having vines growing down the sides as well. So, we do have some work left to do. But obviously the hardest part is over and it looks fantastic!

Great Job Hon! :)

----------------------------

2010-12-08T14:24:00.001-08:00

SIGH

It was a very long night.

I am extra emotional and sensitive right now. I am over-tired. I am on the verge of tears constantly today...but let me just say that I am so grateful.

All I need to say is that I am so grateful for everyone. My family, my friends and neighbors.

Mostly my husband and kids and for the happiness and blessings they bring to my life. And my Heavenly Father. I know he is watching over my family right now.

I am just grateful.

Life, you know...Life?

2010-12-05T18:02:00.000-08:00

Sometimes we need a little perspective. Soooooo cool.

Have a great week and keep your fingers crossed that my car gets fixed for REAL tomorrow.

Christmas Wish List

2010-12-02T19:41:00.000-08:00

Okay folks. A lot of my friends this year have posted their hearts desire's for this season. I am trying not to be too selfish this year. I only want to go with my needs here. So here's my Christmas Wish List for this Christmas December 2010:

1. A maid (only twice a week would do for me)

2. A personal driver

3. A chef (I would settle for 3 days a week on this one)

4. A nanny

5. A personal hairstylist

6. A fashion designer

7. Unlimited amounts of money

Too much to ask for? I think NOT! HA HA Hope you are having a great holiday season. This week has been tough for me, but I am hoping now that the car *should* be really truly fixed, things will start looking up! Here's to a Happy Friday tomorrow and a great weekend!

Thanks and Giving

2010-11-28T18:10:00.001-08:00

Whew! It has been a super busy week! It started with last Saturday (a week and one day ago) where I started coughing. Sunday I did not feel great, but really didn't feel terrible. More just had an annoying cough that was keeping me up all night. By Wednesday I still felt okay, but started to feel the cough in my lungs. I never felt terrible the whole time I was sick, just more annoyed by the cough and since I wasn't sle4ping very well, I was extra tired. I decided to go into the doc and learned I had bronchitis. He gave me this great inhaler to help and medicine and off I was to prepare for Thanksgiving at MY HOUSE on Thursday. The house was spotless, the pies were made, the details were starting to come together- and FINALLY, I was feeling better!

Thanksgiving was great. We had my in-laws come over. My sis-in-law got sick and her family couldn't come, so it was a slight change in plans but everything still turned out nicely. We did not do a turkey (I know, gasp, but we just couldn't fathom having a turkey for such a small group of people, so we did a ham). We had ham, mashed potatos and gravy, rolls, pistachio salad, stuffing, deviled eggs, corn, delicious punch, pumpkin pie with whipped cream and vanilla ice cream. All the food (minus the whipped cream and ice cream and the ham) was homeade and delicious!

If I do say so myself, not bragging or anything, but it turned out so yummy!

I even had some fun with the place settings and made place cards for everyone along with some "feathers" for each plate to make it turkey-ish. I think it looked nice! We also used our china!

I have so much to be Thankful for this year, but the few things at the top of my list are:

My family- My husband and all he does for me and the boys.

My boys- Naughty as they can be, I love them more than words can say.

My Mom, Dad, Brothers, Sisters, Aunts, Uncles, In-laws of all kinds. FAMILY is everything to me. I am so lucky to be part of such a large and loving family and am so blessed to have such great relationships with everyone.

My Friends- I need friends. I am just that kind of person. I have friends from everywhere- Arizona, Boise, Utah, and more! I am so lucky to be surrounded by great friends and truly feel blessed in my life for them!

My Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and my Heavenly Father. I could not live my life without the knowledge I have. I am so grateful to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I am grateful for the things that have happened in my life that have witnessed to me that my Savior is there for me.

I am just so grateful for my health and the health of my family. I am grateful, thankful and happy this year. I could go on and on, but these were just at the top of my list ;)

Thursday was fun, but we also love going through all the ads for the sales on Black Firday. We made out lists and I TRIED, reallllllly hard, to go to bed early Thursday to begin my shopping at 2:00am. But my body just can't take going to bed early sometimes- I am quite the night owl usually. So I went upstairs and got in bed at 8:30, but didn't fall asleep until 11:15ish. Then at 1:15 Cortney accidently woke me up and I couldn't fall back asleep knowing I was getting up soon. So I got up, got ready and headed to Kohls at 2 in the morning.

I wore: full length leggings with jeans over them. 3 shirts, a hoodie sweatshirt and a winter coat. I wore a headwrap (large thick warm headband covering my ears), two sets of gloves AND 4 pairs of socks with large boots. It was -2 degrees outside!! I met my mother in law at Kohls and we stood in line waiting for the doors to open. Once they did, we split up like mad and grabbed what we wanted/needed. 45 mins later, I was out of Kohls and on my way to my next stops: I hit, Walmart, Target, Sports Authority, Smiths, JcPenny and Macy's. I got everything on my list except ONE thing and was home by 8:30 in the morning. I took a 2 hour nap, then it was time to set up our Christmas Decorations, as per our yearly tradition.

Now, our house is fully deocrated, my Christmas shopping is 95% done and it's time to plan our trip to Arizona, finish the last minute Christmas things I need to get done (I do have several projects I need to focus on) and then plan my Christmas baking.

What a crazy busy week, that I can honestly say as fun as it was, I am glad it is over and now we can dive into the Christmas Season!

The Menu

2010-11-23T20:37:00.000-08:00

I am excited I get to host Thanksgiving at my house this year for my in-laws and sister in law with her husband and kids. The Menu is planned. The groceries are bought. Tomorrow the pie baking begins.

So while there is a Blizzard outside, I am toasty warm in my house making preparations for the special day to come. I am So Thankful this year for so many things. More to come soon...

Yummmmmmmmmmmmy!

2010-11-18T10:58:00.000-08:00

I don't share a lot of recipes, but realized the other day that the best receipes I have had lately are one's I got from different blogs...so I must share when it is worthy!!

So here is the best Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Bread EVER! I got this recipe from a friend, who got it from food.com.

Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Bread

1 (15oz) can pumpkin
3/4 cup cegetable oil, plus 2 TB vegetable oil
1 1/2 cups sugar
3 eggs
2 1/2 cups flour
3/4 tsp. baking soda
3/4 tsp. salt
3/4 tsp. nutmeg
3/4 tsp. cloves
2 tsp. cinnamon
1 1/2 cups chocolate chips

Directions:
Preheat oven to 350.
Spray two 8 1/2 X 4 1/2 loaf pans
Mix dry ingredients together (flour, soda, salt, nutmeg, cloves and cinnamon)
Stir chocolate chips into dry mixture
In separate bowl, stir eggs, oil, sugar and pumpkin together.
Add pumpkin mixture to dry mixture and stir until well combined.
Scrape batter into loaf pans and smooth top.
Bake for 45-60 minutes, or until toothpick comes out clean.

I doubled this because 2 loaves just isnt enough!!! Enjoy!

Slowly but Surely

2010-11-16T21:37:00.000-08:00

Slowly but surely there are big changes happening in my house! I have had a few minor slip ups with my plans for not yelling at the kids and trying really hard to have a more peaceful happy home, but really, things have been great! I love the changes that are happening and feel really satisfied that this is the beginning of greater things. It is amazing to me that the small changes I have made so far have made such a big difference. But EVERYONE is happier!

As with most things in life, when I make changes in my life, for the better, I see signs everywhere that I am making the right choices. I mean, everywhere. I hear someone say something, I see a sign on the street, an article on the internet, etc. It seems to be everywhere I go and whatever I do, I am seeing or hearing something that lets me know I am on the right path--and that motivates me even more!

Like, for example, tonights enrichment. There was a small lesson before the activity we did, but that lesson was exactly what I needed to hear! It was all about how us as moms are always trying our hardest to do the best we can, but sometimes we let go on our children's needs. Sometimes we are putting on a movie but not watching it with them or getting out a book and not reading it WITH them. And everything that was said was what I needed to hear- It was as if the lesson was meant for me.

And then there was this quote that was so perfectly spoken:

"I don't want to drive up to the pearly gates in a shiny sports car, wearing beautifully, tailored clothes, my hair pefectly coiffed, and with long, perfectly manicured fingernails.

I want to drive up in a station wagon that has myd on the wheels from taking the kids to scout camp.

I want to be there with a smudge of peanut butter on my shirt from making sandwhiches for a sick neighbors children. I want to be there with a little dirt under my fingernails from helping to weed someones garden.

I want to be there with children's sticky kisses on my cheeks and the tears of a friend on my shoulder.

I want the Lord to know I was really here and really lived."--Marjorie Pay Hinckley

So I am still working on things- I am still getting my house in order. I am still only doing the best I can. But I am giving it my all and am happy with the progress!!

The Larson Family

Sledding and other good stuff

Catching UP!!

Merry and Bright

Scrooge

Overwhelmed

Serious Cuteness

I can do it, I can do it!

A few Halloween pictures...

Perspective...during the best day EVER!

Bleh

A Mother's Love

Paxton's Birth Story

The bloodiest Halloween ever!

Family

Our New Life

Yawn.

What's a Mom to do?

Answers

OH MY GOODNESS!!!!

Body Image...and all that jazz

The latest Larson happenings...

Keaton's Big Birthday!

Somehow I will Survive

A New Day

The Doctor Debate

Quick and Easy Project

NICU Reunion

Girl's camp!

Amazing

Ohhhhhhh Kyler

Cali...the beginning

Recipes Please

Baby's Room

Camping

Lemonade Stand

Still Shocked

Boy oh BOY!!

I know, I know

Life

Need a laugh today?

Changes

Larson Family Reunion

Summer Fun

Worst Mom Award

The BIG Shocker, Part 2

**The BIG Shocker**

Move over Preschool, Hello Kindergarden!

Routines

I really must be doing something right!!

~Mothers~

Calling All Moms of Thumb Suckers....

****Changes*****

The Potty Problem

Easter Sunday

You Gotta Have Friends!

Do you need to laugh today?

Baseball has begun!

Buttons!

Hats...and the flu

Pretty, Pretty PLEASE?!

~Colleen Lois Mills~

**UPDATE**

The BIG DAY is almost here...

Kyler is *almost* 7!!

Another Review and Giveaway!!

The Surgery

All about Kyler...mostly.

Giveaways, Finally

Check. IT. out.

Zumba, the color Red and Good Food!

****TORN****

Growing Up Too Fast

Valentine's Day 2011

Project 1 DOWN!

Just normal life

All things 31

New Years Resolutions 2011

Profound Moments in Life

I Know!

The BIG Shocker

Changes*

UPDATE

Kyler is almost 7!!

TORN